FOT Forum
FOT Community => General Discussion => Topic started by: TRL on July 09, 2007, 07:21:59 PM
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My wonderful cat Oliver who is one of the most important things in this world to me has been diagnosed with cancer. I was talking with a few folks on the FOT chat last week and I know Sarah had some advice regarding diet but it was not just a diet issue unfortunately.
Oliver hasn't eaten voluntarily in awhile and the vet has been doing everything he can for him with IV and all. I know have to decide about chemo and whether it is a good decision. I think I have partially already decided to at least try it out for now.
I know there are a lot of pet folks on here and I am curious for any advice in dealing with similar situations. It is appreciated. I am going to hang out with the little guy now.
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I've never been in your situation, but want to send you my best wishes.. I'm thinking of you and your buddy, I hope everything goes well. Just love him tons. He's going to need it..
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I am so sorry. Our family cat, Sammy, had lung cancer. (Before you ask, no one around him smoked, nor did Sammy smoke har har.) We put him to sleep six years ago, and I still miss him. We made that decision based on our vet's advice and the advice of the two specialists our vet recommended. I can't give you advice on what to do, as your cat's situation could be different than Sammy's. Chemo might be a viable option. Ask your vet if he knows any cancer specialists. Get second and third opinions. I drove two and a half hours for a third opinion. Everyone I spoke with said that chemo was not effective on his type of cancer, and that I should watch his eating habits. Sammy was with us about three months after his diagnosis, and then he stopped eating. At that point, we brought Sammy in, and our vet recommended euthanasia. We took his advice, and I think it was the right thing to do in our situation. This is very sad, but I think it's important to know -- we didn't know. Euthanasia is instant, which is good for your cat. This is just something you should know so you have some time to say goodbye to your friend. We had some time alone with Sam in the clinic to say goodbye, but it didn't feel like enough. Maybe it's never enough, and I'm crying now, so I can't imagine this is making you feel very good.
During the ordeal, I learned that cancer is not uncommon in cats around the age of 13 or 14. It's a sad fact, and it's not easy for you or your friend. After Sammy was diagnosed, his behavior changed significantly. What was most remarkable was the way he would spend every minute sitting next to us. He used to be a very independent cat, but that changed when he got sick. I don't know if he was telling us he was ready to go, or was scared and needed company, but I am certain he knew what was coming and wanted to spend all of his time with us. Maybe I'm anthropomorphizing a little too much.
Call me if you want to talk about it. I'll listen.
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I'm sorry to hear about your cat. I had to have my cat Henry put down last year, it was a harrowing experience that I still don't like to think about, but I know it was the right thing to do.
Even if the chemo would be effective on your cat's cancer, you have to weigh up his or her's chance of getting better against what I imagine would be the pretty unpleasant experience of the treatment itself. Sorry to sound so negative.
Good news dept -
I found a kitten 8 days ago. She was trapped in the chassis of a car and crying. I called her Crumble.
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Oh, TRL, I'm so sorry. Damn it all--why couldn't it have been his diet that was the problem.
Laurie and Jason both say sensible things. Certainly, before you decide to go ahead with chemo, you should get some other opinions, since it would only be cruel if the kind of cancer he has isn't reliably responsive to that treatment. The point is to do what's best for him, not you, as I have no doubt you already know. It's horribly hard, but sometimes helping them die is better.
So, so sorry. I doubt there's anything I can do to help, but if there is . . . At the least, I can offer a virtual shoulder to cry on.
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Certainly, before you decide to go ahead with chemo, you should get some other opinions, since it would only be cruel if the kind of cancer he has isn't reliably responsive to that treatment. The point is to do what's best for him, not you, as I have no doubt you already know. It's horribly hard, but sometimes helping them die is better.
TRL, I'm so sorry to hear about your baby. I love my cats more than I love most people, and even when I lost my kitty at age 20 to just plain old age it was super tough. Still makes me cry now, and that was about 9 years ago.
I wholeheartedly agree with Sarah about getting the second opinion. It's rare that a vet will recommend chemotherapy. I had a friend whose vet recommended chemo, and when she took the cat to another vet for a second opinion, vet #2 was appalled: the first vet had made it seem like Scooter had a chance of surviving with the chemo. It turns out that his cancer was so bad, the cat was just in pain for an extra week. As difficult as it was to believe, vet #1* was just trying to make more money. It was awful. He ended up needing to be put down anyway.
This whole thing is very upsetting. I'm really sorry you have to deal with this and I hope everything works out for you and your little guy.
*Falls Road Animal Hospital in Baltimore, MD: don't go there.
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My prayers go out to your cat.
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I don't have much to add to the previous thoughtful responses, but I can certainly sympathize with you because on Christmas Eve 1995, my dad and I had to take my cat (Beau, age 10) to be put to sleep because it was suffering too much after an extended bout lung cancer. As Jason said earlier, the experience was certainly harrowing, but there was some solace to be had in his peaceful passing. Hope everything turns out well for Oliver.
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I don't really have any advice other than to do what is best for Oliver. Ultimately the decision will have to come from you. I just felt the need to post to let you know I'll be thinking of you and your cat.
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I appreciate all the advice and messages. I wish there were things I could do for his diet but at this point a feeding tube is essential to at least to see if he can take much. He has not eaten in a week and I have been both food and water in front of him with no luck. Sarah offered up some great ideas but I think time wasn't on my side for any of it. Without the food tubes he literally had no more than two days and maybe less and he would have suffered a lot during that time. We are checking to see if the food tubes will get him passing food and then consider the idea of chemo. Its possible that the tubes won't work and then I have to make the horrible decision.
I really do appreciate the really kind folks on here and the caring stories. In the little time I have been on here and the FOT chat and listening to the show, I got the feeling that this is a great group of people. This has definitely proven me right. I am hoping to listen in tonight since I don't really plan on doing much after I see the cat in two hours. I hopefully will sleep a little bit tonight before work and then get him back from the vet with hopefully some good news.
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TRL, I hope Oliver gets better and doesn't suffer too much. No matter what happens he knows he's loved and that's a gift.
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I didn't get in to the chat or listen to the show but nothing new has happened. I will probably post down the line depending on the status but I really appreciate all of the concern and help everyone has given. Keep your fingers crossed for good outcomes. I see my cat in about an hour.
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well, I was given something positive for once. He took to the stomach tube and finally passed some food and is at home with me on my bed while I type. He needs to be fed with a stomach tube but I was worried that I may have to put him to sleep tomorrow. Its definitely day to day but I am going to take this positive news and enjoy being with ollie bear tonight. This may be the first positive thing regarding him for quite some time. Its not big by any stretch but its something.
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well, I was given something positive for once. He took to the stomach tube and finally passed some food and is at home with me on my bed while I type. He needs to be fed with a stomach tube but I was worried that I may have to put him to sleep tomorrow. Its definitely day to day but I am going to take this positive news and enjoy being with ollie bear tonight. This may be the first positive thing regarding him for quite some time. Its not big by any stretch but its something.
Hang in there, TRL and get well soon Oliver.
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Hang in there, TRL. Your cat has a good friend in you.
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Best wishes, TRL. Can't say I've been through such an ordeal, but you and Oliver are in our thoughts.
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My ex-wife had an 18 year old cat that died of everything failure while we were together and in all sincerity her grief was that of one for a beloved family member. It was one of the saddest things I've ever been a party to.
My heart goes out to you and I send my best wishes for a speedy recovery!
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I'm sorry and I hope you are alright. My prayers are with you and your cat.
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Thanks everyone for the kind words. Oliver is hanging in there as much as he can. I am definitely not doing chemo. He hasn't been eating solid food. Its IV and food tubes for him right now. He is enjoying the time I take him outside and sit with him and I am going to take that as a positive. He has a lot of shit going on inside of him so I am not expecting any miracles.
Once again, I am hoping to listen to the show tomorrow night but I am also needing to figure out my shit for going to Poland for work on Friday. The timing is about as bad as one can imagine but what can you do. I'll sleep when I get on the plane. The one nice thing was finally getting to the podcast of two weeks ago in my car driving to and from work and listening to Tom blast physical graffiti and hanging out at gas stations. Genius idea. Truly the best show.
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When I saw that you'd posted here, I was worried. I'm so glad not to find the news I was fearing.
I'm also glad you decided against chemo; I think it would have been cruel and probably pointless. And I'm especially glad Oliver is still enjoying something. With animals--and people, too, probably, although I haven't faced this ordeal with a human yet--I think as long as they can still get a kick out of something, then it's okay to help them stay alive. When all is pain and misery, then one has to help them let go.
I'm so sorry you have to go away for work. Right now, I know all you want to do is treasure every second you have with your dear boy.
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I haven't had a chance to post but I let some other friends know via some message boards and email but my cat Oliver lost his fight against cancer on Sunday 7.22.07. As I was told from my parents, he died with them. They were checking on him on Sunday in the afternoon while my room mate was at work and were going to feed him. They found him upstairs and not doing well. They called the vet to try to bring him in and heard back from the vet shortly to bring Oliver in to the office. Oliver died shortly after hearing from the vet in my room at my house next to my bed. He was struggling with breathing due to the weight he gained from the fluids building in his stomach due to cancer.
I am currently in Poland for work and found out about two days ago. Its been up and down but I wanted to thank everyone who offered help. I feel very disconnected right now but I fortunately am doing something somewhat enjoyable which is volunteer teaching english at a Polish summer camp. Its in not a very wealthy area of Poland. The nice and friendly people have made it easier at times for sure. Its hard to really think about it too much and I have been distracting myself as much as possible.
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I'm so sorry, TRL. I was half-thinking you might check in on the chat last night, and when you didn't I wondered if it was because Oliver had died (although I knew it could have been because you're in Poland right now). I'm so glad your parents were with him; I know you must feel awful that you couldn't be there, but it would have been much worse for you, I suspect, if he had died alone. I'm also glad he didn't have to suffer long, since it seemed pretty clear that he wasn't going to get better.
It's good you're doing something absorbing right now. My sister, who recently lost one of her dogs, has far too much time to grieve, and it's dragging her down a lot.
Once more, with feeling, SO, SO SORRY!
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I'm so sorry, Tom. I know it's not easy, but I hope you feel better soon, knowing that Oliver isn't in pain any more. When you get back, maybe you can adopt a new kitty friend? I know that helped me after a proper mourning period.
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I'm so sorry to hear that Oliver passed, TL. But at the same time, I think you can be comforted to know that he died in the most comfortable place for him - your room, with your smell and your essence, etc.
Poor guy. At least he's not in pain anymore. Hang in there, TL.
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Hang in there, TRL. It's been about a year since I lost Jabba the Cat. The vet was on his way over to euthanize her but she seemed to get the message and passed away peacefully on my lap. Burying her in my backyard was definitely the hardest thing I've ever done, but time has transformed my grief in to gratitude. It was awesome to have her for as long as I did. Cats are the best.
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Sorry, man, that's tough. I'm glad your parents were there.