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The Best Show on WFMU => Show Discussion => Topic started by: Bozarth on December 19, 2007, 12:19:54 PM

Title: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Bozarth on December 19, 2007, 12:19:54 PM
I really wanted to call in with this, but I am listening on the archive.

This past christmas, my one aunt was not able to make it back to the family homestead back in Illinois. My aunt is not known for her great gifts. One year, she brought in a bag of things she bought in Japan at the 1000 Yen Store, which is basically The Dollar Store. I got a plastic cheese grater with a plastic tub to catch the grated cheese. At least, that's what it looked like. I couldn't read the instructions, or the product name, since it was in Japanese.

Another year, when I was 16, my brothers, my cousins, and I got a garment bag. It broke the first time I used it. I'm more amazed I actually tried to use it.

This past year, though, is the topper.

Like I said before, she couldn't make it for the actual Christmas Eve festivities that we have. She brought in her gifts at a later date, after I had gone back to New Jersey. Later on in the year, I had to come home for another family event on Memorial Day. My mom gave me a wrapped present from my aunt and said "I don't know what it is, but she said it was for your 'collection'." I don't collect anything, so I was very intrigued as to what it could be. I opened it up to find a small plaster snowman. A glitter covered snowman. I'm a 23-year-old man and she gave me a snowman for my snowman collection. My mom also recognized the snowman as same one another aunt gave to the families the year prior.

At that point, don't get me anything. I'm an adult now, and I can handle not getting something.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: ughwhy on December 19, 2007, 12:39:42 PM
A plastic cheese grater? How successful is that cheese grater at grating cheese?
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Bozarth on December 19, 2007, 12:52:30 PM
I wouldn't know. I didn't use it.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: ughwhy on December 19, 2007, 06:38:22 PM
So what you're saying is you're ungrateful for that gift.















I'm sorry.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: masterofsparks on December 19, 2007, 07:14:01 PM
Christmas triumph = Best Show on 12/25
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Tyrannosaurus Rocks on December 19, 2007, 07:20:20 PM
So what you're saying is you're ungrateful for that gift.

I believe, from first hand experience, we are supposed to call those people stooges. I don't know, maybe it was another insult.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: erika on December 19, 2007, 07:25:15 PM
Christmas triumph = Best Show on 12/25

SERIOUSLY! That's some awesome stuff. I don't know that I can listen since I'm actually celebrating xmas this year (with my non-jewish boyfriend) but we shall see...

Go Tom, go.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Andy on December 19, 2007, 07:35:42 PM
little known fact: Tom is Jewish.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: masterofsparks on December 19, 2007, 07:58:40 PM
Quote
I don't know that I can listen since I'm actually celebrating xmas this year (with my non-jewish boyfriend) but we shall see...

If your Christmas is anything like my usual Christmas, you'll be bored to death by approximately 10 am and counting the minutes till 8 pm.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: erika on December 19, 2007, 08:38:53 PM
Nah, I've celebrated Christmas before. I like it! All the food and presents and laying around watching xmas TV. Chinese food and a movie is fun, but it's nice to mix it up a bit!
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: samir on December 19, 2007, 09:04:01 PM
My better half is Jewish, too, and also does Chinese food for Xmas... what up with that?
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Miss on December 20, 2007, 12:21:01 AM
A Secondhand Christmas Tragedy -

My mom told me this story about a Christmas gathering when she was a kid. She was really young - maybe seven or eight years old, and she REALLY wanted to give all the adults gifts for Christmas. Of course, she's a kid, so my great grandma gave her a few dollars and she ended up getting everybody one of those little LifeSavers book things.. Anybody know what I'm talking about? All the adults acted enamored by the gift, but when it came to one of my uncles (now ex) wives, she rolled her eyes and sarcastically said, "Oh. What I've always wanted."

No wonder she's the ex wife now - egads, how obnoxious!

And on a personal note -

Christmas Triumph - I finally have hard evidence to give to a lawyer & I may be closer to getting on SSI than I thought. This is probably the best Christmas gift I could've been given.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Martin on December 20, 2007, 06:09:58 AM
Some of youse guys better be standing by with a stream-catching software or something next Tuesday, if Tom for some reason follows through with the threat of not archiving/podcasting the show.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Forrest on December 20, 2007, 04:32:58 PM
Some of youse guys better be standing by with a stream-catching software or something next Tuesday, if Tom for some reason follows through with the threat of not archiving/podcasting the show.

Surely even Tom at his meanest couldn't descend to that level of cruelty.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Sarah on December 20, 2007, 07:08:10 PM
Sure he could.  Why risk it?  Be there or be square.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Beth on December 20, 2007, 10:19:02 PM
YAY I'll be in Montclair for Christmas! I can listen to the REAL radio in my car AND at home. Swweet!
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Dorvid Barnas on December 23, 2007, 03:31:20 PM
Some of youse guys better be standing by with a stream-catching software or something next Tuesday, if Tom for some reason follows through with the threat of not archiving/podcasting the show.
I'm on it, son. 
Seasons greetings.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Martin on December 23, 2007, 06:15:39 PM
And to you, Dorvid. Good guys win.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Jixby Phillips on December 24, 2007, 12:08:23 AM
I consider this a Christmas Triumph:

One year when I was in high school I was insistent that I get a Civil War Calendar. It was an early foray into irony. I put it at the top of my list that year. I planned to make a funny video documenting the days leading up to me receiving the present, and I'd freak out upon opening it. This was before the Nintendo 64 kid (or the video of it becoming popular anyway). So don't go thinking it was me lampooning that.

So I get the calendar, and in addition to that I get a shitload of other Civil war stuff. I got a lot of Lincoln-themed shirts and mugs and stuff like that, all of which I still use.

Telling this story in the past, I've:

1. Gotten hugged by a girl (what?)
2. Been questioned why I was making a video. "What would you do with it?" younger people would ask. For some reason I'd have to explain to people that people made videos before youtube existed.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Emily on December 24, 2007, 12:45:45 AM
Jixby so have you uploaded it to youtube?


one of my prized possessions is a Lincoln bank bottle for pennies. it's a glass bottle with his face on the neck. his hat is the cap and it has a slit in it where you drop them in. I'm very cautious to only put pennies in it.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Beth on December 24, 2007, 03:40:42 PM
Christmas tragedy:

My high strung mother screaming and crying because I'll be arriving a little late this Christmas Eve.

Let this board be a witness, when I have kids I will never make them feel like crap around the holidays.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: dave from knoxville on December 24, 2007, 08:59:20 PM
Christmas tragedy:

My high strung mother screaming and crying because I'll be arriving a little late this Christmas Eve.

Let this board be a witness, when I have kids I will never make them feel like crap around the holidays.

I'll take that bet.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: GetOffMyBone on December 25, 2007, 10:08:55 AM
I consider this a Christmas Triumph:

One year when I was in high school I was insistent that I get a Civil War Calendar. It was an early foray into irony. I put it at the top of my list that year. I planned to make a funny video documenting the days leading up to me receiving the present, and I'd freak out upon opening it. This was before the Nintendo 64 kid (or the video of it becoming popular anyway). So don't go thinking it was me lampooning that.

So I get the calendar, and in addition to that I get a shitload of other Civil war stuff. I got a lot of Lincoln-themed shirts and mugs and stuff like that, all of which I still use.

Telling this story in the past, I've:

1. Gotten hugged by a girl (what?)
2. Been questioned why I was making a video. "What would you do with it?" younger people would ask. For some reason I'd have to explain to people that people made videos before youtube existed.

North Or South, man?
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: samir on December 25, 2007, 10:19:59 AM
I'm going to be taking every opportunity today to throw ham at dogs.

If that hasn't happened by showtime at 8pm, I'll consider today a waste and/or a failure.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Dorvid Barnas on December 25, 2007, 03:21:40 PM
(https://www.ehlenbachscheese.com/uploads/products/3179_cheese_pics_038.jpg)
I was just given a football sausage.  Triumphant or tragic, the jury's still out.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: dave from knoxville on December 25, 2007, 03:56:30 PM
The two greatest gifts God gave to mankind, in one tacky package. It's a triumph, by GOD!
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Martin on December 25, 2007, 05:18:14 PM
I wouldn't know what to do first - eat it or throw it. Solution: someone else throw it, you catch it - with your gob*!

* old-timey speak
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Tim K in DC on December 26, 2007, 12:59:49 AM
(https://www.ehlenbachscheese.com/uploads/products/3179_cheese_pics_038.jpg)
I was just given a football sausage.  Triumphant or tragic, the jury's still out.

I say doubly triumphant: it's sausage, and once you eat it, it's one less football in the world.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Beth on December 26, 2007, 12:02:54 PM
Christmas tragedy:

My high strung mother screaming and crying because I'll be arriving a little late this Christmas Eve.

Let this board be a witness, when I have kids I will never make them feel like crap around the holidays.

I'll take that bet.

Dave, you most likely speak the truth. But until I have children, I'm going to live in blissful denial about the fact that yes, I am turning into my mother.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Beth on December 26, 2007, 12:13:27 PM
Also, a Christmas triumph. My boyfriend got me an exact replica of the red dress Buttercup wears in the Princess Bride!! It may sound nerdy to some but it's a triumph for me! I'll be doing so much frolicking in grassy fields this summer!

Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: erika on December 26, 2007, 01:51:19 PM
(https://www.ehlenbachscheese.com/uploads/products/3179_cheese_pics_038.jpg)
I was just given a football sausage.  Triumphant or tragic, the jury's still out.

Oh my god that's a triumph! HAHAHAH I love it!
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: mostlymeat on December 26, 2007, 03:34:31 PM
Christmas triumph: having last week's podcast to listen to on christmas eve while wrapping presents.

-Ajax
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Sploops on December 26, 2007, 04:10:07 PM
little known fact: Tom is Jewish. Hindu.
Fixed.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: dave from knoxville on December 26, 2007, 04:54:10 PM
Christmas tragedy:

My high strung mother screaming and crying because I'll be arriving a little late this Christmas Eve.

Let this board be a witness, when I have kids I will never make them feel like crap around the holidays.

I'll take that bet.

Dave, you most likely speak the truth. But until I have children, I'm going to live in blissful denial about the fact that yes, I am turning into my mother.

I only say it because I am so turning into a combination of the least desirable parts of my parents.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Miss on December 26, 2007, 04:59:04 PM
Also, a Christmas triumph. My boyfriend got me an exact replica of the red dress Buttercup wears in the Princess Bride!! It may sound nerdy to some but it's a triumph for me! I'll be doing so much frolicking in grassy fields this summer!

That is an awesome gift. The dress is stunning & I think every little girl who saw that movie wanted to wear one just like it. :)
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Emily on December 26, 2007, 05:14:59 PM
Also, a Christmas triumph. My boyfriend got me an exact replica of the red dress Buttercup wears in the Princess Bride!! It may sound nerdy to some but it's a triumph for me! I'll be doing so much frolicking in grassy fields this summer!

That is an awesome gift. The dress is stunning & I think every little girl who saw that movie wanted to wear one just like it. :)

while you're out in the fields you should roll your boyfriend down a hill and have him yell-

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas Yoooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssh!!!"
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: DigiDan on December 26, 2007, 06:44:29 PM
Christmas Tragedy:
Last year... single worst day of my entire life. Nearly lost my life and I am very lucky to be alive. (details spared.)

Christmas Triumph:
I can't really specifically remember any particularly great year or present. At least now I can know that no Christmas will ever be worse than last year's. The holiday has also sort of taken on an expanded meaning for me now, as I also see it as a celebration of my life. Not Jesus's life though. ;)
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: samir on December 26, 2007, 08:57:42 PM
little known fact: Tom is Jewish. Hindu.
Fixed.

Score! Me and The Kid can unite in our Hinduism. Polytheism rules.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: mostlymeat on December 31, 2007, 01:03:15 PM
Christmas Tragedy: my buddy said the xmas nite podcast was up, but it's not.

Tom did a show on xmas, right?

TOM!

friend: "so, do you want to go see Juno?"
me: "eh, not really"
friend: "why not?"
me: "tom said it's not good"
friend: "who's tom?"
me: "Tom Scharpling, the host of the Best Show on WFMU"
friend: "so, what, you won't do anything that tom doesn't like now?"
me: "pretty much. Tom is always right"

INSTEAD WE WATCHED LEPRECHAUN IN THE HOOD 2: BACK TO THA HOOD (THE SEQUEL TO LEPRECHAUN 5, IN THE HOOD) AND THERE WAS NO COBBLING OR SHOE REPAIR OF ANY KIND IN THIS MOVIE!

Many complained that it was terrible, but I think this is the first movie where someone was killed with a bong.

-Ajax



Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Phantom Hugger on December 31, 2007, 04:23:12 PM
Here's an older one that I wanted to call in with but chickened out....

199something

My Mom gets me and my older brother CDs for Christmas. My brother gets Van Halen's OU812, I get a live Bob Seger album (something with the Statue of Liberty on the cover).

A: My brother doesn't even LIKE music (no joke, he hates music)

B: The only time Bob Seger ever came on my radar was when those truck commercials were on or when I was watching Risky Business.

When asked to explain how she settled on these choices she said that according to the wall at the Musicland, Van Halen was the #1 record (so brother gets that), and I got the #2 record on the wall because I was into more underdog alternative music.

Sometimes I wish we lived in a world where there were only 10 choices.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: DigiDan on December 31, 2007, 05:27:07 PM
Many complained that it was terrible, but I think this is the first movie where someone was killed with a bong.

But certainly not the last...

(http://www.upcominghorrormovies.com/movies/evilbong3.jpg)

Also, if anybody would like to see the Leprechaun scene MostlyMeat refers to, there is a clip on youtube:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LqiP6lW--G4[/youtube]
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Beth on December 31, 2007, 08:32:05 PM
Christmas Tragedy: my buddy said the xmas nite podcast was up, but it's not.

Tom did a show on xmas, right?

TOM!


Tom was threatening the whole time that it was not going to be archived or podcasted, that it was a special show only for those who were listening at the moment. It wasn't podcasted as far as I can tell, but it was archived on WFMU's page, so you can go and have a listen. Also, this way, you're not missing out on all of the glorious Christmas music Tom played.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Amplituden on January 02, 2008, 12:25:47 PM
Christmas Triumph :

Getting an amazing model train set when I was 10.  I picked out the smallest cheapest model train set out of a catalogue and would have been thrilled to get that.  What I got had a steam engine that smoked, and had lots of cool things like a tower that you could drive the train under and load it up with coal. (well plastic bits that looked like coal)

Christmas Tragedy :

My family used to go over to another family's house and exchange gifts every year.  My sister and I each got our own board games (I got the board game Zaxxon).  My mother bought the other family's kids chocolate hocky pucks.  Really awkward and embarrassing.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Kibblesmith on January 04, 2008, 10:07:05 AM
In 2000, when I was a fat highschooler, I got stuck in a hole on X-Mas day.

Firetrucks had to cut me out with a saw.

That's the short version.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: bobby. on January 04, 2008, 11:01:00 AM
Christmas Tragedy: my buddy said the xmas nite podcast was up, but it's not.

Tom did a show on xmas, right?

TOM!


Tom was threatening the whole time that it was not going to be archived or podcasted, that it was a special show only for those who were listening at the moment. It wasn't podcasted as far as I can tell, but it was archived on WFMU's page, so you can go and have a listen. Also, this way, you're not missing out on all of the glorious Christmas music Tom played.

boooooooooooooo, i'm only reading this now, having been festively refreshing and refreshing and REFRESHING iTunes for the past week.

hahaha

damn
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: Brian R on January 05, 2008, 09:58:54 PM
My parents love to make a big deal out giving gifts for Christmas. They go overboard every year despite protests from my brother and me... and it's really sweet, though it tends to make us feel pretty bad since they don't have all that much money and the two of us are adults (I'm 29, he's 26) and probably too old for all of it.

Still, every year they ask for Christmas lists from us and then they try to get thoughtful gifts that generally have nothing to do with what they made us ask for.

So, about four years ago, we were opening gifts on Christmas morning. We were down to our bigger gifts (I can't remember what mine was) and I watched my Dad open his. It was this hideous leather bomber jacket that my Mom got him from Wilson's. I could see how excited my Mom was and it looked like my Dad really liked it, so I said to them, "wow, that's really awesome! That's gonna look great on you, Dad," even though it wouldn't.

Fast forward to the next Christmas. We're down to our bigger gifts, and I definitely remember what I got this time. I tore open the wrapping paper to reveal a Wilson's Leather box. Knowing full well that I'd never ask for anything from Wilson's ever and figuring it was just a recycled box, I joked before opening it... "ha, what is this, a bomber jacket?"

Of course, it was. In fact, it was the same exact bomber jacket my Dad got the year before. We had matching leather bomber jackets now. And I could see on both of their faces how hurt they were by my joking. My Mom told me that she thought I loved my Dad's so much that it would be a great gift. My Dad handed me the money for the jacket right then and there. It was awful and I felt like the worst person ever.

One bright side... my parents stick to the lists, now.
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: emdasher on December 25, 2008, 10:20:12 PM
Christmas triumph -- I got a lot of money! I also accidently locked my keys in my car, which saved me from having to spend time with my extended family!

[Edit: removed linked to article about Christmas Eve massacre---far too depressing and bizarre.]
Title: Re: More Christmas Triumph, Christmas Tragedy.
Post by: emdasher on December 25, 2008, 11:13:51 PM
Also:
(http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41DN18FulWL._SS400_.jpg)
!