FOT Forum
FOT Community => Links => Topic started by: kimota on March 25, 2008, 01:12:30 PM
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Woman Goes for Leg Operation, Gets New Anus Instead
A German retiree is taking a hospital to court after she went in for a leg operation and got a new anus instead, the Daily Telegraph is reporting.
The woman woke up to find she had been mixed up with another patient suffering from incontinence who was to have surgery on her sphincter.
The clinic in Hochfranken, Bavaria, has since suspended the surgical team.
Now the woman is planning to sue the hospital. She still needs the leg operation and is searching for another hospital to do it.
Thief forgets to take son on getaway
Friday, March 21, 2008 A shoplifter looking to make a quick getaway from a Dutch supermarket after stealing a packet of meat left police a crucial piece of evidence - his 12-year-old son.
In his haste, the 45-year-old thief made a solo dash to his car, batting away a supermarket worker who had flung himself on the vehicles' bonnet in a bid to stop the escape.
Police in the southern Dutch town of Kerkrade said they managed to contact the thief via the boy, but he had refused to return and collect his son.
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I would not throw myself on the hood of a car to stop a guy from stealing a packet of meat.
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Woman Goes for Leg Operation, Gets New Anus Instead
Those doctors really tore her a new one.
[/leno]
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Also, there's a horrible joke about breaking a foot off in an ass in there somewhere, but I can't find it.
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Woman Goes for Leg Operation, Gets New Anus Instead
A German retiree is taking a hospital to court after she went in for a leg operation and got a new anus instead, the Daily Telegraph is reporting.
The woman woke up to find she had been mixed up with another patient suffering from incontinence who was to have surgery on her sphincter.
The clinic in Hochfranken, Bavaria, has since suspended the surgical team.
Now the woman is planning to sue the hospital. She still needs the leg operation and is searching for another hospital to do it.
Makes me think of Marty Shonson.
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Trunk-cam reveals jungle secrets
Cameras held by elephants' trunks have been used to provide an intimate view of tigers in the jungle.
Because the big cats are used to the presence of elephants, the tusked giants were able to get far closer to them than a human film crew ever could.
Thanks to the "trunk-cams", the team was able to follow four newborn tiger cubs all the way through to adulthood.
The footage was recorded over a period of three years in the Pench National Park in India.
The cameras also recorded other animals, including langur monkeys, sloth bears and red dogs.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7312511.stm
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Neat-o.
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In every group of doctors, there's at least one extra asshole.
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Dutch meat must be really expensive.
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Well, many dutch cars are teeny tiny so maybe it's not such a big deal to fling your body on top of a moving one....
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A brand new anus! Wow!
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Emo kids attacked in the streets of Mexico
"LA Weekly's Daniel Hernandez has been covering the phenomenon for the paper and on his blog Intersections. "A bizarre wave of emo-bashings is sweeping across Mexico. The movement is being generated on message boards and social networking sites by non-emo youth who highly dislike the emo look and attitude. Hernandez reports that it started on March 7th in Queretaro where about 800 young people hunted down emos in the city's Centro Historico for some head bashing. "The next weekend it spread to Mexico City, where emos faced off against punks and rockabillies at the Glorieta de Insurgents, the epicenter of emo social space in the capital."
http://prefixmag.com/news/emo-kids-attacked-in-the-streets-of-mexico/17812/
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Sorry that is kind of messed up. I couldn't figure out how to fix it.
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Skip to 1:27. The Gorch would be so proud.
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'Wombat rape victim' cried wolf
A man who told police he had been raped by a wombat has, perhaps not surprisingly, failed to substantiate his claim in court.
In fact, Arthur Ross Cradock has ended up in the dock himself and been ordered to do 75 hours' community work for wasting police time.
Not only did he make up the wombat rape story, but the New Zealander also insisted the trauma of the attack had left him "speaking Australian".
http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=128695&in_page_id=2
China: Man Has A Cigarette Smoking Pet Turtle
A TORTOISE that smokes and appears to be addicted to nicotine has been discovered in China’s northeastern province of Jilin.
<object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Diy8S-2DFPA"></embed></object>
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My tortoise has a taste for Remy Martin and demands it constantly. Should I be worried?
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ATLANTA ROBOT HITS STREETS
Down-and-outers are targets of bar owner's 'Bum Bot'
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/03/28/MNEJVRI19.DTL
That is what Rufus Terrill calls the rolling, remote-controlled invention he uses to flush out the prostitutes and pushers who gather near his Atlanta bar, which is two blocks from the city's largest and most controversial homeless shelter.
The Bum Bot, like the homeless people it polices, is a creature of hand-me-downs. The wheels are from one of those scooters for the elderly; the PA system is a walkie-talkie wired to a home-alarm speaker. The rotating turret is an old Cajun meat smoker.
The cylindrical smoker gives the Bum Bot its R2D2-ish profile. But its black armor - made of exercise mats - and the stenciled letters spelling out SECURITY lend it a menacing air.
An infrared camera and a 2 million-candlepower spotlight are mounted on the turret under a homemade cannon, which squirts jets of cold water at up to 200 pounds per square inch....
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Star Wars comes to Holyhead as Darth Vader strikes back in Jedi's back garden
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2008/03/28/nhelmet128.xml
Jedi Master Jonba Hehol - known to family and friends as Barney Jones, 36, of Holyhead - was giving a TV interview in his back garden for a documentary when a man, dressed in a black bin-bag and wearing Darth Vader's trademark shiny black helmet, leapt over his garden fence.
Wielding a metal crutch - his lightsaber presumably being in for repairs - the Sith Lord proceeded to lay about his opponent, whose Jedi powers proved inadequate for the task of defending himself.
After besting Master Hehol in single combat, Vader, who The Sun reports was under the influence of alcohol, went on to assault the camera crew and a hairdresser...
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ATLANTA ROBOT HITS STREETS
Down-and-outers are targets of bar owner's 'Bum Bot'
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/03/28/MNEJVRI19.DTL
That is what Rufus Terrill calls the rolling, remote-controlled invention he uses to flush out the prostitutes and pushers who gather near his Atlanta bar, which is two blocks from the city's largest and most controversial homeless shelter.
The Bum Bot, like the homeless people it polices, is a creature of hand-me-downs. The wheels are from one of those scooters for the elderly; the PA system is a walkie-talkie wired to a home-alarm speaker. The rotating turret is an old Cajun meat smoker.
The cylindrical smoker gives the Bum Bot its R2D2-ish profile. But its black armor - made of exercise mats - and the stenciled letters spelling out SECURITY lend it a menacing air.
An infrared camera and a 2 million-candlepower spotlight are mounted on the turret under a homemade cannon, which squirts jets of cold water at up to 200 pounds per square inch....
Have any of the homeless tried, oh I don't know, knocking the robot over?!
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Have any of the homeless tried, oh I don't know, knocking the robot over?!
Have you ever tried knocking over a robot? Even if the robots don't have claws, you still need to remember that they're made of metal and robots are strong.
Also, whoever gets me for Secret Santa this year, this robot would be at the top of my wish list. Thanks!
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I'm ashamed to admit I was expecting something else when I read the phrase "Bum Bot."
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The rotating turret is an old Cajun meat smoker.
Actually, this part wasn't far off.
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Have any of the homeless tried, oh I don't know, knocking the robot over?!
Have you ever tried knocking over a robot? Even if the robots don't have claws, you still need to remember that they're made of metal and robots are strong.
Also, whoever gets me for Secret Santa this year, this robot would be at the top of my wish list. Thanks!
Every veiled Sam Waterston reference is noted and cherished.
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I'm ashamed to admit I was expecting something else when I read the phrase "Bum Bot."
(http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g63/totep22/2213214266_e829ce9649_o.png)
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Reports: Mosley involved in Nazi sex scandal
Max Mosley, president of the Federation Internationale de l'Automobile, F1's governing body, is facing intense pressure to resign from his post after being implicated in a Nazi role-playing orgy according to British tabloid News of the World.
The report detailed a five-hour "Nazi-style" orgy between Mosley and five prostitutes at a house in Chelsea. In a video on the newspaper's Web site, it shows a man identified as Mosley arriving at an apartment. The man is then greeted by a woman playing the role of a Nazi prison guard, checking his hair to see if he has been kept free of lice "at the other facility."
Later, another woman in mock death camp garb enters the video and the man said to be Mosley is heard speaking German.
At one point during the video, the man yells "she needs more of ze punishment!" while brandishing a leather strap over a woman's bottom before striking her with it and counting in German, as other women in Nazi-style uniforms look on.
The report is even more disturbing because of the fact that his father, Oswald Mosley, was a former British politician who served in Parliament for both the Labour and Conservative parties. Before World War II, however, Oswald led Britain's fascist organization according to the Times of London.
Formula One chief executive Bernie Ecclestone said the sport shouldn't be affected by the report.
"Assuming it's all true, what people do privately is up to them," Ecclestone told the Times in a story posted late Sunday on its Web site. "Knowing Max it might be all a bit of a joke."
Still, the pressure is mounting for Mosley to step aside, particularly from Jewish groups, according to the Times.
This report comes mere months following a scandal in Barcelona where Lewis Hamilton, Formula One's only black driver, was verbally taunted by fans. Mosley came out shortly after the incident and threatened to impose penalties on tracks if any racially-themed incidents appeared in the future.
The FIA not only governs Formula One, but helps establish appropriate standards for all other motor racing championships, including NASCAR.
The Associated Press contributed to this report.
http://msn.foxsports.com/other/story/7971044?MSNHPHMA (http://msn.foxsports.com/other/story/7971044?MSNHPHMA)
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I kept waiting to read
ing something substantial, like he went to pro nazi rallies or had a Hitler manequin in his basement or something but as it is, it seems a little light. Not being a NASCAR fan, maybe I'm just too distant from it. I'm totally with "what people do privately is up to them", as long as it isn't hurting anyone else. I guess 'hurting' needs to be defined? Thanks for sharing the story!
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Apply to Be One of the First Humans on Mars: Project Virgle
http://www.google.com/virgle/index.html
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British scientists make human-cow embryos
http://uk.reuters.com/article/UKNews1/idUKN0242023320080402
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - British researchers say they have created embryos using human cells and the egg cells of cows, but said such experiments would not lead to hybrid human-animal babies, or even to direct medical therapies.
Malaysian Fisherman Reels in Shark with 'Webbed Feet'
http://www.underwatertimes.com/news.php?article_id=73210864950
(http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g63/totep22/shark_web_feet.jpg)
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Malaysian Fisherman Reels in Shark with 'Webbed Feet'
http://www.underwatertimes.com/news.php?article_id=73210864950
(http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g63/totep22/shark_web_feet.jpg)
Candygram maam.
This makes me cringe so horribly bad. I can't explain why it is so disgusting, but there is no doubt at all that it is. Shivers.
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Barney the foul-mouthed parrot teaches other birds how to swear at tourists
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=557874&in_page_id=1770
First he told the mayoress in rather forthright terms to go away.
Then Barney the swearing parrot used more Anglo-Saxon language on a vicar and two police officers.
But, worse still, he is now teaching his bad habits to two other birds at the wildlife sanctuary where he lives.
...Their favourite words are f*** off, b******* and t***.
Russian squirrel pack 'kills dog'
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/4489792.stm
Squirrels have bitten to death a stray dog which was barking at them in a Russian park, local media report.
Passers-by were too late to stop the attack by the black squirrels in a village in the far east, which reportedly lasted about a minute.
They are said to have scampered off at the sight of humans, some carrying pieces of flesh.
Man faces five years in jail after hitting a boy with... a hedgehog
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=557613&in_page_id=1770
A man faces five years in jail after being accused of assaulting a teenager with a hedgehog.
William Singalargh, 27, is said to have thrown the hedgehog from 15ft away during a row with the unnamed 15-year-old.
"When it hit the victim in the leg, it caused a large red welt and several puncture marks," said a police source in Whakatane, on the east coast of New Zealand's North Island.
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British scientists make human-cow embryos
http://uk.reuters.com/article/UKNews1/idUKN0242023320080402
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - British researchers say they have created embryos using human cells and the egg cells of cows, but said such experiments would not lead to hybrid human-animal babies, or even to direct medical therapies.
Malaysian Fisherman Reels in Shark with 'Webbed Feet'
http://www.underwatertimes.com/news.php?article_id=73210864950
(http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g63/totep22/shark_web_feet.jpg)
As much as for showing me this picture, I thank you twice for making me aware of underwatertimes.com
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Programmer pops the question on girlfriend's video game: 'Bejeweled' with an engagement ring (http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/custom/fringe/sfl-0415videoproposal,0,5418124.story) (This happened in Jersey City!)
"I thought it was pretty cool, in a nerdy way,'' Peng told The Star-Ledger of Newark.
The couple plan to marry over Labor Day weekend, and PopCap, the Seattle company that makes "Bejeweled,'' will fly the couple to Seattle as part of their honeymoon.
"Most video game companies would frown on people manipulating their games,'' said Garth Chouteau, a spokesman for PopCap.
"But it won him a woman. As a bunch of geeks we have to say, 'Bernie, hats off to you.'''
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Yanks unearth Sox jersey at new stadium By KAREN MATTHEWS, Associated Press Writer
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080413/ap_on_fe_st/bba_yankees_curse_foiled;_ylt=AivPDoR.H7SvKT73dP6lBxSs0NUE
NEW YORK - So much for the curse. The New York Yankees have ended a construction worker's attempt to jinx their new stadium with a buried Boston Red Sox jersey.
Team officials watched Sunday as construction workers removed the jersey, with slugger David Ortiz's name on it, from 2 feet of concrete in a service corridor of the stadium that's under construction.
The team says a construction worker — who is a Red Sox fan — recently buried the jersey there while on the job. Two other supervisors found the tattered shirt Saturday.
The Yankees plan to donate the jersey to charity, and may pursue a lawsuit against the construction worker.
(http://www.nypost.com/seven/04132008/photos/news003c.jpg)
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Company makes floating ad 'clouds' in the shape of, well, anything
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24162063/
Now, one company aims to indulge those flights of fancy by actually making "clouds" in the shapes of, well, anything, from the Atlanta Braves' tomahawk to Mickey Mouse's iconic head.
These clouds are actually a mixture of soap-based foams and lighter-than-air gases such as helium, something like what you'd get if you married helium balloons with the solutions that kids use to blow bubbles from plastic wands....
(http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g63/totep22/080416-flogo-peace-hmed_hmedium.jpg)
Earth's Hum Sounds More Mysterious Than Ever
http://www.livescience.com/strangenews/080416-earth-hum.html
Earth gives off a relentless hum of countless notes completely imperceptible to the human ear, like a giant, exceptionally quiet symphony, but the origin of this sound remains a mystery.
Now unexpected powerful tunes have been discovered in this hum. These new findings could shed light on the source of this enigma....
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Swedes find 'world's oldest tree'
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7353357.stm
The 9,550-year-old conifer first took root at the end of the last ice age
A tree said to be the oldest on the planet - thought to be nearly 10,000 years old - has been found in Sweden.
The age of its genetic material was recently calculated using carbon dating at a laboratory in Miami, Florida.
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Aurora Borealis in Murmansk
http://englishrussia.com/?p=1869
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Food Rationing Confronts Breadbasket of the World
http://nysun.com/news/food-rationing-confronts-breadbasket-world
By JOSH GERSTEIN, Staff Reporter of the Sun | April 21, 2008
MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. — Many parts of America, long considered the breadbasket of the world, are now confronting a once unthinkable phenomenon: food rationing.
Rice is stored at a National Food Authority warehouse at Manila, the Philippines, on April 17.Major retailers in New York, in areas of New England, and on the West Coast are limiting purchases of flour, rice, and cooking oil as demand outstrips supply. There are also anecdotal reports that some consumers are hoarding grain stocks.
At a Costco Warehouse in Mountain View, Calif., yesterday, shoppers grew frustrated and occasionally uttered expletives as they searched in vain for the large sacks of rice they usually buy.
At a Costco Warehouse in Mountain View, Calif., yesterday, shoppers grew frustrated and occasionally uttered expletives as they searched in vain for the large sacks of rice they usually buy.
“Where’s the rice?” an engineer from Palo Alto, Calif., Yajun Liu, said. “You should be able to buy something like rice. This is ridiculous.”
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Brazil priest carried aloft by balloons missing
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24244282/
updated 3:48 p.m. CT, Mon., April. 21, 2008
SAO PAULO, Brazil - A Roman Catholic priest who floated off under hundreds of helium party balloons was missing Monday off the southern coast of Brazil.
Rescuers in helicopters and small fishing boats were searching off the coast of Santa Catarina state, where pieces of balloons were found.
Rev. Adelir Antonio de Carli lifted off from the port city of Paranagua on Sunday afternoon, wearing a helmet, thermal suit and a parachute...
Man with road rage accidentally shoots himself
http://www.theweirdpost.com/wordpress/2008/04/man-with-road-rage-accidentally-shoots-self/
TEMPE — A man accidentally shot himself after he waved a gun in anger at a fellow driver in Tempe, police said.
He was waving the gun in an attempt to threaten the fellow driver when the gun suddenly fired. Police were already dispatched to the incident and tried to stop the now wounded driver.
The man tried to evade police by driving into a nearby neighbourhood after the Friday night road-rage incident, but he crashed his car into a canal embankment, according to a police report.
The man then got out of the car and ran away, but police soon caught up to him. He was taken to a hospital and was in serious condition.
The other driver in the incident, who was uninjured, fled the scene, but was later located by police, department spokesman Brandon Banks said.
The drivers’ identities have not been released.
Banks said authorities are talking to the uninjured driver but have not been able to speak to the driver who shot himself.
Man Arrested After Pumping Gas Into Imaginary Car
http://www.theweirdpost.com/wordpress/2008/04/man-arrested-after-pumping-gas-into-imaginary-car/
LOUISVILLE, Ky. - A Frankfort man was arrested on drug trafficking charges early Sunday morning after he was reportedly pumping gas into an imaginary vehicle. According to the arrest report, Metro Police arrived at a gas station at First and Jefferson streets in Louisville and immediately smelled marijuana coming from Joshua L. Moore, who station clerks contend was filling up an imaginary vehicle.
Officers searched Moore and found “two large baggies” of marijuana and a large amount of Ecstasy. Police said Moore also had a cell phone and a large amount of money, which they said was indicative of trafficking.
Man superglues condom to penis to save on safe sex
http://www.theweirdpost.com/wordpress/2008/04/man-superglues-condom-to-penis-to-save-on-safe-sex/
A Romanian man needed some help after his ‘great idea’ started to feel not so great. He had super glued his condom to his penis.
The 43-year-old father-of-five told doctors he and his wife didn’t want any more children. Their obvious solution was to start using condoms, but the condoms Nicolae Popovici’s wife bought were a bit ‘roomy’.
The couples solution for this small problem was not to buy new condoms that did fit, but to make the big ones fit. One way or another.
They used superglue to glue the condom to the man’s penis. This did not only solve the size-issue, but they could also re-use the condoms, so they thought.
Scientists decode brain farts
Up to 30 seconds before your goof, the brain starts acting abnormally
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24245365/
We've all goofed up and flubbed up things we've previously done time and again.
It turns out the root of these brain farts may be a special kind of abnormal brain activity that begins up to 30 seconds before a mistake even happens.
The solution to such screw-ups could be a kind of mind-reading hat, a device to predict and even prevent mindless errors that can threaten lives.
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The Yankees . . . may pursue a lawsuit against the construction worker.
You can sue someone for trying to put a hex on you?
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Why did Robert Redford stick his cock in a jar of Paul Newman's spaghetti sauce?
Well, the two men have been friends for over 40 years, do you think he's gonna stick his cock in a competitor's product?
http://www.watoday.com.au/national/man-caught-with-penis-in-pasta-jar--near-nobbys-beach-20081120-6crq.html