FOT Forum

FOT Community => General Discussion => Topic started by: Denim Gremlin on May 14, 2008, 01:31:10 PM

Title: gross.
Post by: Denim Gremlin on May 14, 2008, 01:31:10 PM
I've eaten french fries I found in the garbage at Six Flags.


edit: this was a voluntary and sober decision.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: kimota on May 14, 2008, 01:40:30 PM
I took a big swig out of a beer bottle which I thought was mine but was half full of someone's chewing tobacco spit.  Instant projectile vomiting and I can't smell anything wintergreen flavored without having an instant flashback to that.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: todd on May 14, 2008, 01:45:32 PM
I took a big swig out of a beer bottle which I thought was mine but was half full of someone's chewing tobacco spit.  Instant projectile vomiting and I can't smell anything wintergreen flavored without having an instant flashback to that.

I did this, except with a pepsi-can that was half full of my grandma's cigarette butts and ash.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: erika on May 14, 2008, 01:47:47 PM
I'll eat candy that has fallen on the floor. M&M's, that sort of thing.

I also can't think of many things that are funnier than when I fart and it wakes up my cat and she cries a little. It cracks me UP.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: cutout on May 14, 2008, 01:48:12 PM
I read, beginning to end, an interview with Diablo Cody.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: yesno on May 14, 2008, 01:49:16 PM
thank you for reminding me totep. I did that once, too. Amazingly, it didn't make me vomit, even though I find spit and boogers to be the most disgusting things in the world.

In my army days, I was on a detail hauling trash in what was basically a regular truck. To empty said truck at the collection point, I basically had to wade around in it, knee deep. At one point I stepped on a milk container and rotten milk exploded into my face. Later on, we had an epic war involving half-rotten oranges.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: kimota on May 14, 2008, 01:50:32 PM

I also can't think of many things that are funnier than when I fart and it wakes up my cat and she cries a little. It cracks me UP.

Mine too!  But she doesn't have to be sleeping to voice her displeasure.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Susannah on May 14, 2008, 01:52:36 PM
During our recent class-camping trip, my students neglected to recycle their 65 soda cans and *I* had to fish them all out of the very wet trash.  I'm failing them all.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Andy on May 14, 2008, 01:53:07 PM
this thread has fotchan written all over it.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: erika on May 14, 2008, 01:55:01 PM
I PICK MY SCABS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Denim Gremlin on May 14, 2008, 01:56:04 PM
this thread has fotchan written all over it.

no anonymity to hide behind now. I think it's better this way.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: cutout on May 14, 2008, 01:56:08 PM
Some magic filter must've changed di@bl0 c0dy to "john ford".
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Emily on May 14, 2008, 01:56:40 PM
I've eaten french fries I found in the garbage at Six Flags.


edit: this was a voluntary and sober decision.

i heard about you freegans today on NPR:

http://www.wnyc.org/shows/bl/episodes/2008/05/14
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Dan B on May 14, 2008, 02:00:23 PM
My friend eats anyones left over popcorn he finds at movie theaters.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Denim Gremlin on May 14, 2008, 02:01:38 PM
I've eaten french fries I found in the garbage at Six Flags.


edit: this was a voluntary and sober decision.

i heard about you freegans today on NPR:

http://www.wnyc.org/shows/bl/episodes/2008/05/14

ew, I don't like how they relate it to Fight Club.

I think it's funny that every 6 months or so I see a new news piece about this like it's some new thing.

We've been eating out of the garbage for years people! It's gross I know, get over it.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: joanna on May 14, 2008, 03:16:30 PM
i can't think of my own so i have to use my best friend. she called me four years ago and said, "i just ate a cinnamon candy that i found in my desk and i don't know how old it is, is that gross?"

"no," i said.

"what if i know for a fact that i didn't put it there, so it's been there from the previous person who had the desk?"

"that makes it a little gross."

"what if i tell you that it was partially unwrapped?"

"oh god, melissa, that is gross."

"what if i tell you that after i put it in mouth, i started to suspect that someone else had already started eating it, and that's why it was partially unwrapped, but instead of spitting it out, i just shrugged and kept on eating it?"
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: gravy boat on May 14, 2008, 03:30:43 PM
I mixed my wife's pumped breast milk into my coffee. Kept drinking it after I realized the mistake.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Sploops on May 14, 2008, 04:11:52 PM
I PICK MY SCABS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I EAT MY SCABS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: John Junk 2.0 on May 14, 2008, 04:25:06 PM
I used to leave half-empty (i mean half-full!) glasses of water all over my apt.  One time I picked up a glass that I thought was *current* and cold.  I took a drink and was like "Woah!  This is room temperature and there's like a leaf in it from a house plant or something.  Woops I guess it's old.  I will now pull this leaf out of my mouth."  Pull the "leaf" out and guess what ---it's a cockroach.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: ericluxury on May 14, 2008, 04:35:37 PM
I picked up a Coke can that I had left in the sun for a half-hour while helping garden at my parents house and took a big drink. It was lumpy for some reason. I looked inside and a swarm of ants were inside of the can. I spit out about 150 ants after swallowing who knows how many.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: henry on May 14, 2008, 05:02:56 PM
i worked on a dairy farm.  there were a lot of experiences on the farm that can be classified as gross. 

- we milked twice a day (morning/night).  twelve cows (milked 100 a day) would enter the milk house at a time.  six on either side of you, with there udders at about chest level.  if something spooked any of the cows, they would shit.  if one shat, all of them would shit.  if you were at the far end of the milk house and couldn't get to door before the shit switch was fully flipped you were gonna be covered from head to toe.

- still born calves or calves that we couldn't find after they were born had to be put on the four-wheeler and driven to the top of the mountain and disposed of.  a real bummer job.

- new born calves that hadn't started walking needed to be carried to the calve barn.  slimy job, but rewarding if you gotta help the little guys take there first steps.

- once dropped my hat in the cow barn before i started to clean it for the day.  it was completely soaked in the previous nights supper.  i took it to the hose and put it back on. 


i worked on a hog farm for a while when i was younger.  that is a whole other list of gross.




 
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Laurie on May 14, 2008, 05:03:23 PM
Eric, I just said EWWWWWWWWWUUUUUUCH!!!

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWUCH!
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: todd on May 14, 2008, 05:05:54 PM
These stories are so much grosser than I was expecting. I've got the willies.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: emma on May 14, 2008, 05:08:34 PM
You would think I would be smart enough to avoid this thread while eating.
Actually, maybe you wouldn't. Because clearly I'm not that smart.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Sarah on May 14, 2008, 05:10:29 PM
I want to hear more about the dairy farm and the pig farm.

And I sort of like your friend Melissa, joanna.

Title: Re: gross.
Post by: joanna on May 14, 2008, 05:33:42 PM

And I sort of like your friend Melissa, joanna.



you should! she's the greatest, for this and many more reasons. the cinnamon candy incident, as we refer to it now, only endeared her even more to me.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Gilly on May 14, 2008, 05:47:59 PM
You would think I would be smart enough to avoid this thread while eating.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Martin on May 14, 2008, 06:45:25 PM
Once at a dimly-lit cocktail party, I fell victim of the "glass full of cigarette butts, ash, and some punch" thing. After a mortifying sip, I put it away and pretended like nothing happened. I'm nothing if not a class act.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: dania on May 14, 2008, 09:10:38 PM
this is gross:
(http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3220/2487950302_5291d3e55f.jpg)
                                               -Anne Geddes

Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Dorvid Barnas on May 15, 2008, 12:46:39 AM
Once at a dimly-lit cocktail party, I fell victim of the "glass full of cigarette butts, ash, and some punch" thing. After a mortifying sip, I put it away and pretended like nothing happened. I'm nothing if not a class act.

That you are, sir!


Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Sarah on May 15, 2008, 08:46:55 AM
(http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3220/2487950302_5291d3e55f.jpg)

Judging from this, I think Anne Geddes's next step should be a version of Laurie's beloved lotus boob that replaces the worms with infants.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: iAmBaronVonTito on May 15, 2008, 01:13:06 PM
i remember when i was younger my dad got sick one day and was couch ridden with an episode of cold sweats and congestion, having to frequently cough mucus up, so he used a cup next to the couch.  meanwhile, i mistook it for my cup of water...i took a nice, big gulp.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: John Junk 2.0 on May 15, 2008, 03:52:03 PM
i remember when i was younger my dad got sick one day and was couch ridden with an episode of cold sweats and congestion, having to frequently cough mucus up, so he used a cup next to the couch.  meanwhile, i mistook it for my cup of water...i took a nice, big gulp.
That's profoundly disgusting.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Sarah on May 15, 2008, 03:57:09 PM
I was eating some ramen once (wait, that's not the gross bit) and noticed what appeared to be a tiny piece of noodle on my hand.  As I raised it to my mouth, it squirmed:  it was a segment of tapeworm from my cat Mitchell's ass. 

Coda:  I squealed and shook it off my thumb, so the story isn't as gross as it could be.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Bryan on May 15, 2008, 04:02:57 PM
(http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3220/2487950302_5291d3e55f.jpg)

Judging from this, I think Anne Geddes's next step should be a version of Laurie's beloved lotus boob that replaces the worms with infants.

I don't know what a lotus boob is, but I happen to know that Anne Geddes has done the babies as worms thing. I'll see if I can find an image...
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Sarah on May 15, 2008, 04:07:11 PM
This (http://img397.imageshack.us/img397/1990/wtftit26mi.jpg) is a lotus boob.  (Don't click, Laurie.  You've seen it before anyway.  Hell, I learned about this from you.)
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: erika on May 15, 2008, 04:11:51 PM
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I clicked. I'll never be the same.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Sarah on May 15, 2008, 04:21:50 PM
I'm so sorry, erika.  I thought that knowing Laurie finds it horrifying would be warning enough. 

But can't you just see little babies squirming around in there?  I think Bobo should get right on it.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: mokin on May 15, 2008, 04:45:41 PM
If it makes you feel any better, the lotus boob is photoshopped (http://www.snopes.com/photos/medical/breastrash.asp).

Careful about following links on that page, it links to real things that are just as horrifying as the fake lotus breast.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Bryan on May 15, 2008, 04:46:45 PM
Oh. My.

I'm very sorry I registered my curiosity.

And yes, I can see a Geddes-ized version of that.
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Fig Neutron on May 16, 2008, 09:00:19 AM
Once at a dimly-lit cocktail party, I fell victim of the "glass full of cigarette butts, ash, and some punch" thing. After a mortifying sip, I put it away and pretended like nothing happened. I'm nothing if not a class act.

Indeed.  I've only perfected that art over time.   ::)  Latest was New Years.  Swig of beer bottle, subtle gag reflex, set bottle down, calmly proceed to bathroom....BLLLLEEEEEAAAHHHH!!!!!!

And not mouth related, but a couple days ago I dropped something under the radiator.  Retrieved it, but felt something else too, so figured I should get it out, and reached back in.  Felt like a plastic piece with a couple prongs, and I was even thinking, "Oh Lord, I bet it's something gross..."

Crispy mouse.  BLLLEEEEAAAAHHHH!!!!!! x10 ('prongs' being 'paws')
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Shaggy 2 Grote on May 24, 2008, 11:42:38 PM
A little over a year ago, when I first started posting, I clicked through a site linked in the bad tattoos thread and wound up at a photo essay of some poor girl who had gotten smooshed by a truck.  I was so traumatized that I lost a couple nights of sleep (what kind of ghoul would snap all those photos etc.) and almost abandoned the board for good.  I'm glad I came back.

That said, the lotus boob is pretty fucking horrible, photoshopped or not, and I am never ever clicking through the links on that Snopes page.

This sort of pales in comparison, but about 13 years ago I was a waiter and also a stoner idiot, and I would sometimes eat uneaten food from people's tables, provided it looked relatively untouched.  Well, a wad of gum stuck to a chicken finger broke me of that habit!
Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Fig Neutron on May 25, 2008, 06:34:11 AM
I haven't seen these, but I hear they are gross:

Spankwire [link]
BME Pain Olympics [link]

Sorry, no links, just a goof.

And I'm not sure what this one is, but seems pretty heavy....

http://youtube.com/watch?v=imxE0U5GfTs


(P.S. J-Grote, love the new sketch avatar).

Title: Re: gross.
Post by: Shaggy 2 Grote on May 25, 2008, 11:43:25 AM
Thanks, Fig!  Though I owe it all to Neil Numberman.