FOT Forum
FOT Community => General Discussion => Topic started by: Laurie on December 14, 2006, 08:02:41 PM
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I'm going to camp out at the Electronics Boutique this Saturday night for the re-launching of the Nintendo Wii. This is my brother's big Christmas gift. Now, this store is located at the Falls, which is known for its rapists. My screenprinting friends made me a tee shirt that says "Ask Me About My Venereal Disease." I also intend to wear a RAPE WHISTLE around my neck. I'm sure it will keep me safe!
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can you pick me one up too?
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Just get one of these. http://www.rapestop.net/ (http://www.rapestop.net/).
(http://www.spiegel.de/img/0,1020,516034,00.jpg)
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Is that a... vagina dentata sex toy?
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Is that a... vagina dentata sex toy?
Honey, that's not a vagina.
We have to talk......
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Hardy har har.
Seriously, though, what kind of person is willing to put razors in their vagina to stop a potential rape?
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I'm just thinking that it would probably end up injuring the user when trying to insert it.
you gotta love South African ingenuity though. Here's their anti-carjacking device in action:
(http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/230000/images/_232777_car300.jpg)
http://www.cnn.com/WORLD/africa/9812/11/flame.thrower.car/ (http://www.cnn.com/WORLD/africa/9812/11/flame.thrower.car/)
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I've been laughing at the vaginas-in-your-chocha toy all day long. Is that shit patented? Please, please tell me it is. I must read the patent submission.
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You know what's funny is I first saw that thing in a design magazine - ID. They gave it like 10 best awesomist design props or something.
And apparently you get a little button with it that says something to the effect of "I'm hooked!"
And to remove it, there's a special de-applicator, I guess you'd call it.
Industrial design + vaginas = perfect match.
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On the downside if a rapist penetrated you and then became ensnared you'd end up with an angry rapist in excrutiating pain (right fellas?) trapped inches from your face.
Also do they make an anal version? Not just for guys but to protect the ladies against canny rapists who wise up to the "I'm hooked" buttons.
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On the downside if a rapist penetrated you and then became ensnared you'd end up with an angry rapist in excrutiating pain (right fellas?) trapped inches from your face.
One would hope the design allowed for a recoil after the inevitable shrinkage. Nothing turns me off more than tiny hooks in my penis. On the other hand, I'm not a rapist. Who knows what they're into.
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One would hope the design allowed for a recoil after the inevitable shrinkage. Nothing turns me off more than tiny hooks in my penis. On the other hand, I'm not a rapist. Who knows what they're into.
[/quote]
Hmm... This may add some existential drama to the Cannonball Run Musical...
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Laurie- Plan B is only $33.45 @ Costco, if you need it.
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Did someone say vagina dentata?
(http://www.type-h.net/vagiteeth.jpg)
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anal...
<snip>
canny rapists...
quote]
Now that is some loaded word choice there.
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I got it! YAY! I spent the night with some really nice folks, talking about monorail cat and Juggernaut cat and BRB Going to the Moon Cat and invisible bike cat and invisible sandwich cat and do not want dog and lime hat cat and orange hat cat. It was fun!
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I actually stood in Times Square at Toys R Us for about 6 hours on launch night to get one.
It was actually pretty fun. Everyone I met wasn't a complete psycho like I expected.
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Inevitably, I am now envisioning a bunch of people waiting in line to buy the latest scary vagina dentata device chatting cheerily about all kinds of cats (and, no, I don't mean pussies), in a scene worthy of that oh-so-sentimental tearjerker Boogie Nights. A heartwarming Christmas story, much like Jason's penny tale.
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The notion of a vagina dentata raises some interesting issues.
So where would you get your vagina dentata checked out?
OB-GYN or at the dentists?
Can you eat with that thing?
Could the act of coitus technically be regarded as oral?
FWD or mouthwash?
Inquiring minds need to know.
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Can you eat with that thing?
I think so, yes, but I'm pretty sure you don't want to know what its diet consists of. I just ended a sentence with a preposition.
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What about flossing?
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Flossing would probably be much more enjoyable.
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http://www.teethmovie.com/
This will be playing at Sundance in January. And I thought horse-sex was extreme.
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Oh god, the creepy kid from Nip/Tuck is in that movie. His eyebrows are at least ten times scarier than a toothy vagina. He looks like Michael Jackson.
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Yes, his eyebrows are creepier than a toothy vagina. Good call. I'd like get get a t-shirt with that quote but...well...bad idea. OK, I have fulfilled my yearly use of the word "vagina" now so I'm not allowed to say it again till December 19, 2007.
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OK, I have fulfilled my yearly use of the word "vagina" now so I'm not allowed to say it again till December 19, 2007.
This should make your next visit to the gynecologist more interesting than usual, no disrespect intended.
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Nah, Stan. In my experience, the word "vagina" has never cropped up during a pelvic exam or the formalities that precede and follow it. "Cervix," maybe. More usually, the conversation focuses on the weather or some other neutral subject.
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Question: Is it just my gynocologist, or does ever gynocologist do this? They say, "This is my hand, this is the speculum," et cetera, et cetera. I mean, what else is it going to be? My gyn is a woman, so it's not going to be her dick. Unless, of course, she intends on using a dildo. Seriously, though, I'm not a horse. I'm not going to be spooked. Jesus.
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Laurie, thanks for the laugh - that is so true and so funny. Yes, they do that. And like Sarah said, we basically want them in and out (um) of there as quickly and painlessly and with the least amount of embarassment as possible so if there's any conversation its about something entirely unrelated.
Most of it is like, "You are going to feel something very cold" or "this may pinch a bit" or "how bout dem Eagles?"
I guess it could be best compared to the awkwardness of a prostate exam.
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"how bout dem Eagles?"
You mean "nem Eagles"?
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exactly. :)
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Man, Wiener Doctors do the same thing. Only you stand and you got different junk down there. You're standing there, pants down, and he goes "I don't want to alarm you, but I'm going to touch you now." As if a Penis MD wouldn't normally be touching your bits, but he's making an exception this time.
Maybe mine was just cautious.
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I never had anyone say anything to me, but it's also an entirely external affair, anyway you slice it. ACtually, that's not always true, and yes, I'm aware of the poor word choice.
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I never had anyone say anything to me, but it's also an entirely external affair, anyway you slice it. ACtually, that's not always true, and yes, I'm aware of the poor word choice.
Wait, are we talking about sounding now? I've only ever seen that in gay porn.
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Okay, now I'm completely lost. I'm gonna say "no" on talking about "sounding" cause I don't know what you're talking about. Maybe I don't watch enough gay porn.
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One word: prostate.
Has this evolved into the "everything you wanted to know but were afraid to ask" thread?
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I was about to say, "No, sounding isn't about prostate stimulation," but then I remember asking about these little J-shaped rods when I worked at Ye Olde Fornication Shoppe (not its actual name), and it turns out that you can stimulate a prostate by
jamming gently inserting a stick in your urethra. And I was going to put that behind spoiler code for the faint of heart, because it makes even me squirm, but it turns out I don't have spoiler-usage privileges or something like that.
But, yeah, if you're wondering what exactly sounding is? If you've watched Deadwood, you've seen it in action.
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One word: prostate.
Has this evolved into the "everything you wanted to know but were afraid to ask" thread?
No, this thread has evolved into "next level" on more than one level. Crikey.
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I've never watched Deadwood because I just think of it as cowboys who use the F-word. And do dirty things. Like sounding. Which I still don't understand. But maybe that's okay.
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I'm young enough to only have had sparse companioinship with a tinkle doc. Not prostate or sounding.
edit: I just looked up what Sounding was. It's a christmas miracle!
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You people are scaring me, a little.
Of course, the first time I ever got on Ye Olde Internet in 1993/4 (prior to there being anything "graphical" about it), the first two random (honest!) articles I stumbled across were:
1. How to self-catheterize for pleasure, and
2. Smurf gangbang porno
I didn't get back onto the Internet until this year.
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Okay, finally looked it up too. :'(