FOT Forum
FOT Community => General Discussion => Topic started by: JonFromMaplewood on July 29, 2009, 08:42:25 PM
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It is with frustration and sadness that I come to the FOT board with this question/thread.
Since my wife and I got married eleven years ago, we have had four cats. We have done our best to provide each one with a loving home.
But we have run into a snag. We have a cat named Dandy who we took in as a kitten about one-and-a-half years ago. Since Day One she has been different than the others. Very aggressive. Rips apart everything, including human flesh. Our children's art work is constantly destroyed. We cannot keep lamps plugged in because she tends to knock them over. All four human family members have bled on a regular basis because of her apparently random attacks. We are at our wit's end.
Does anyone have any experience with this kind of situation? We do not want to give up on her, but would it actually be more humane to find another home for her in a more rural setting where she can roam outside more than she can in our suburban home on a somewhat busy street? Or is there some type of specialist who is not outrageously expensive who can help train her? We tried to train her ourselves - as we had done successfully with other cats - with a water bottle, but she ultimately just started ignoring the water, almost as if she enjoyed being sprayed. She is hardcore.
Any thoughts would be helpful.
P.S. She is already spayed if that makes any difference in your response.
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Sucks Jon, sorry to hear about the trouble.
I had a blue heeler about 10 years ago that got increasingly aggressive with people. After trying everything under the sun, I finally found her a home at a farm out in the VA countryside through an organization that placed troubled dogs. I found it online, I think they referred to it as a rescue network. I don't want to bum you out with the details of what happened at the farm after I dropped her off, but dogs other than mine seemed to have a good home out there and were in an environment that didn't allow for the violent tendencies to surface as much.
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When I was younger, my parents had my cat declawed. Don't do that (though I doubt you would even entertain it).
My fiancee's parents have a cat about that age that is very frisky, though not quite as destructive as yours. Close, though. I've seen it do aerial acrobatics that shouldn't be possible. It helps to keep their nails clipped, if you aren't doing that already. Also, there are little plastic tips that you can buy and attach with glue to their claws. They won't hurt the cat and they grow out naturally, you just have to get them to stay on.
Another option is to get a toy that will wear them out so they don't get so crazy. There is an item called Da Bird that cats just go insane for. You might have to buy replacement feathers to go with them, but your cat will stop everything she is doing to concentrate on the tiny feathered, flying object that found its way into the living room. After they got that toy for Byakko, they actually had to limit playtime because he would chase it until his heart was pounding and he was burning up. I'd never seen a cat panting before.
But overall, the really destructive stuff is a phase. And rambunctious cats can make some of the best pets when they get older; they're so independent and playful.
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Advice from someone who has had/been around a lot of cats over the years, and has a little occasionally problematic one now:
Cats work best with reinforcement in the form of treats (Whiska's makes some good ones in a pouch, that are even good for cleaning teeths), and tone of voice. The water bottle thing is a temporary and stupid human response reaction to that behavior at best (and trust me, I keep a water bottle next to the bed for last resort stuff too), and will either just scare the animal (but they'll just be like "fuck you, I'm gonna do this until the time it takes you to find the bottle") or get used to it like it sounds in your case.
Lots of times cats like that just need to be tuckered out with play, but organized focused play. Fetch, or one of those feather-tail toys etc, really get her running around for a bit if you can. Give her things she can destroy, cardboard scratching posts, or my cat loves the half of the netflix envelope that you tear off, when he sees that in the mail he gets so excited for me to open it (and then he plays soccer around the house until he decides to destroy it). Top it off with some catnip for an extra punch on the really schizo nights, and you should at least be sure to get some sleep without her terrorizing you guys too much. You really have to think of it as a chore, that needs to be done pretty much every night, with the reward being peace and quiet.
Some cats are just wired wrong though, and once they develop that behavior it can be really, really hard to break them of it. Females especially. My Grandmother had like a grey siamese that got more and more evil as she got older, to the point that she would pretty much hiss and scratch at anyone who was not her. A home with more attention and or less cats with territorial issues might be something to think about though, worst case scenario.
Don't give up on her yet though!
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Lots of times cats like that just need to be tuckered out with play, but organized focused play. Fetch, or one of those feather-tail toys etc, really get her running around for a bit if you can.
Again, if you go this route, Da Bird (http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_sq_all?ie=UTF8&keywords=da%20bird&index=blended) is one of your best possible options. There's plenty of evidence in youtube videos. Watch the acceleration here from zero to crazy:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97CaN1J3TPo[/youtube]
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This happens a lot when cats are separated from their mother before they're weened.
They begin to thrive on negative attention.
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I don't know what your area looks like, but a cat can be an outdoor cat if there's only some amount of space. I mean, they don't need open fields and meadows like a loose dog might to roam in. My cat goes outside a couple of times in my suburbanish sidestreet and mostly just sleeps on the porch, skulks under the porch, and glares at birds. She lives for it, and is much happier when she gets her outside time, but is always back inside for the food. So if you have a backyard it might work.
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There's tons of good advice here, so I offer instead a glimmer of hope: My cat Betty was hugely unpleasant. She was unfriendly and aggressive when I took care of her for a few weeks when she was a kitten and when I got her full-time about a year later, during which interval she had been mistreated by her stressed-out resident of a person, she was a monster, growling, spitting, and constantly drawing blood with claws and teeth. I learned how to deal with her--particularly to pull away at just the right moment when I was patting her (she would growl and purr at the same time and then, if given the chance, clamp down on my hand with frightening force). This went on for years. But here's the glimmer of hope--she did mellow over time. By the end of her life, she was a darling. I well remember an evening when a friend of mine, used to her terrifying behavior and after years of obeying my instruction not to approach her, much less touch her, looked at me wide-eyed and whispered a stunned "What . . . ?" when she jumped on his lap and settled down, purring.
So, there's hope. They can change. Of course, in Betty's case, it took about ten years. And she had the advantage of being allowed to go outside whenever she liked. But one-and-a-half years is nothing; your girl is still a kid. Give her a couple of years and more to do in the meantime--she might turn into a sweetheart yet.
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You all are amazing. Both my wife and I read your responses (and will continue to do so if you keep posting) and were inspired. I have already purchased Da Bird based on your recommendations and will double my efforts to wear her out before we go to bed (which is exactly what we do with our kids).
YesNo, we do let her out quite a bit because we have no choice, she bolts out the door whenever we open it. But we try to keep it to a minimum because we have lost TWO cats to our road. I do not want to spend another rainy day in the backyard digging a hole for yet another cat.
Thanks again everyone.
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You could also try http://www.puffandpooh.com/cat_tips/cat_tree/
That, or a padded room ;)
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I also thrive on negative attention.
In humans, there is no cure. :'(
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Did you ever consider that you might just need a nice carpeted perch to nap on?
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In addition to Da Bird (which make my cats insane as well), another toy I've found that cats love is a laser pointer. They go crazy as soon as it comes out of the drawer. Even my dog likes it.
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I also thrive on negative attention.
In humans, there is no cure. :'(
I'll start spraying you with a spray bottle the next time you jump up on the table, and we'll go from there.
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In addition to Da Bird (which make my cats insane as well), another toy I've found that cats love is a laser pointer. They go crazy as soon as it comes out of the drawer. Even my dog likes it.
In a similar vein, Byakko also loves it when you bring out the Wii pointer. As soon as he hears the noise of the Wii starting up, he moves to sit in front of the TV and wait until he can try and catch that damned hand.
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In addition to Da Bird (which make my cats insane as well), another toy I've found that cats love is a laser pointer. They go crazy as soon as it comes out of the drawer. Even my dog likes it.
the laser pointer does work well with small dogs and cats alike. however, ive heard urban legends and horror stories that its bad for your pets so i stick with the toys and letting "wheat the cat" outside to watch/chase birds that he'll never catch.
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Sasha gets too worked up over the laser pointer. It's like she's forced to hunt it and is haunted by it for an hour after I turn it off. She pants and huffles. I stopped using it once when I thought she was going to have a heart-attack. (Was kind of funny watching her trying to climb a wall....)
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I also thrive on negative attention.
In humans, there is no cure. :'(
I'll start spraying you with a spray bottle the next time you jump up on the table, and we'll go from there.
You sure you want to go down the "spraying" route with a human-as-cat?
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I also thrive on negative attention.
In humans, there is no cure. :'(
I'll start spraying you with a spray bottle the next time you jump up on the table, and we'll go from there.
Don't you "spaying" Buffer old bean?
You sure you want to go down the "spraying" route with a human-as-cat?
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I also thrive on negative attention.
In humans, there is no cure. :'(
I'll start spraying you with a spray bottle the next time you jump up on the table, and we'll go from there.
Don't you "spaying" Buffer old bean?
You sure you want to go down the "spraying" route with a human-as-cat?
Fred-Rick-ess, your insanity is endearing. But you can't spay a boy-cat-as-human. At least, God I hope not.
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JfM, I hope things worked out OK.
To everyone who recommended "da bird" toy: holy shit. I have never seen da cats go so absolutely bonkers. After 4 minutes or so I had take it away because I was afraid their little hearts were going to explode.
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JfM, I hope things worked out OK.
To everyone who recommended "da bird" toy: holy shit. I have never seen da cats go so absolutely bonkers. After 4 minutes or so I had take it away because I was afraid their little hearts were going to explode.
Yes, thanks for checking in, Trotskie. And thanks to everyone for their advice. We bought Da Bird and Dandy went predictably insane. I have never seen her do a "Triple Lindy" before but now it is a regular thing. We have also caved and let her go outside for long periods of time. She may be claimed by the busy road out front, but her life will be fuller until then.
Between these two things - more outdoor activity and more sanctioned indoor activity - she has become much more tolerable at night.
YOU ALL ROCK!
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that so awesome to hear, JfM. im going to grab one of these things for my own cat after reading this thread.
up to this point, ive been letting Wheat stay with the in-laws (in Mississippi) while ive been in phoenix; he's the fattest ive ever seen him. im pretty bummed about it since now i get to go home (for good this time) and get Wheat into the healthy shape i left him in; not to mention, im worried about his health in general.
any suggestions on further steps i can take so he's not so out of shape/unhealthy?
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that so awesome to hear, JfM. im going to grab one of these things for my own cat after reading this thread.
up to this point, ive been letting Wheat stay with the in-laws (in Mississippi) while ive been in phoenix; he's the fattest ive ever seen him. im pretty bummed about it since now i get to go home (for good this time) and get Wheat into the healthy shape i left him in; not to mention, im worried about his health in general.
any suggestions on further steps i can take so he's not so out of shape/unhealthy?
Is he an outdoor cat who hasn't been going out while staying with the in-laws? If you let him back out again his weight will rebalance out. Happened when I kept one of my cats indoors for about 6 months. He turned into a B. Kliban cat.
Otherwise if he's indoor and you want to keep him that way, maybe a cat tree? something he can jump in/on/around?
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that so awesome to hear, JfM. im going to grab one of these things for my own cat after reading this thread.
up to this point, ive been letting Wheat stay with the in-laws (in Mississippi) while ive been in phoenix; he's the fattest ive ever seen him. im pretty bummed about it since now i get to go home (for good this time) and get Wheat into the healthy shape i left him in; not to mention, im worried about his health in general.
any suggestions on further steps i can take so he's not so out of shape/unhealthy?
Is he an outdoor cat who hasn't been going out while staying with the in-laws? If you let him back out again his weight will rebalance out. Happened when I kept one of my cats indoors for about 6 months. He turned into a B. Kliban cat.
Otherwise if he's indoor and you want to keep him that way, maybe a cat tree? something he can jump in/on/around?
he's an outdoor cat thats now indoors but there are some concerns with the in-laws of letting him outside again. i feel okay about it, but there's some background that's involved with their paranoia.
i dont believe in the tree because i see more cats be lazy and sit on those things than climb them. get a job, cat!