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FOT Community => General Discussion => Topic started by: ~L on March 01, 2011, 08:07:02 PM

Title: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: ~L on March 01, 2011, 08:07:02 PM
Tonight I got the following fortunes in my cookies:

1.  A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works.

2.  Great things happen when men and mountains meet.

To top that, the dictionary I used to check the spelling of fortune spells cookie Cooky.
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: ChrisRawk on March 01, 2011, 08:49:36 PM
I got a cookie once that said "You did something wrong.  Think!  What did you do?"

If that wasn't enough the cookie was totally stale.
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: ~L on March 26, 2011, 12:47:55 PM
This one:
 "They can because they think they can."
Yikes!!!!
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: Pidgeon on March 26, 2011, 12:53:02 PM
I always just get a bunch of lucky numbers.
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: ~L on March 26, 2011, 02:29:27 PM
I have an old friend who was told a few lucky numbers by a fortune teller in India in the 1980's.  He'd never played the lottery before, but decided to play the numbers for a nominal amount.  Of course, he won, about 100 dollars, and still regrets not having had more faith and wagered more.  The fortune teller had also told him the names of his and his wife's parents and had gotten them correct. 
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: Steeley Chris on March 28, 2011, 09:58:48 AM
"You will find your Prince Charming."

I got that at two different restaurants.

Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: AllisonLeGnome on March 28, 2011, 01:59:30 PM
The only "fortune" I have ever actually saved:

"For those who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord."

It would occasionally fall out of my wallet and disappoint someone who thought I was carrying around an inspirational message.
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: buffcoat on March 28, 2011, 05:34:14 PM
I got "His eyes wander, but his heart stays at home."

I was like, "Who? That bastard."
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: fish on March 28, 2011, 09:13:39 PM
"Geese can be troublesome."
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: cavorting with nudists on March 28, 2011, 09:27:48 PM
"Geese can be troublesome."

Disappointing is right!  Do not buy into this!

http://www.idausa.org/geese/geese.html (http://www.idausa.org/geese/geese.html)
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: wwwes on May 05, 2011, 01:56:36 PM
"Maybe someday man will walk live on moon"
"Perhaps your stupidity could be the downfall"
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: daveB from Oakland on May 05, 2011, 02:06:39 PM
"Maybe someday man will walk on moon"

Shouldn't you be fired as a fortune-writer if you predict things that have already happened? Unless these are fortune cookies for doubtful conspiracy theorists.
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: cavorting with nudists on May 05, 2011, 02:14:06 PM
It really doesn't inspire confidence in the cookie's freshness.
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: wwwes on May 05, 2011, 02:58:21 PM
"Maybe someday man will walk on moon"

Shouldn't you be fired as a fortune-writer if you predict things that have already happened? Unless these are fortune cookies for doubtful conspiracy theorists.
Typo, it was "man will LIVE on moon". But I have to think the only way you get fired as a fortune cookie writer is if you just start using profanity.
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: JonFromMaplewood on May 05, 2011, 04:27:20 PM
"If people are jumping out of windows, there must be a reason."
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: Gilly on May 05, 2011, 06:56:46 PM
I never saw this thread until now, but a couple weeks ago I received one that gave me a phone number to buy more fortune cookies. Nothing else.
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: Eric Fishlegs on May 06, 2011, 07:24:11 PM
Real fortune I got- "You are not illiterate."
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: Skeletor on May 07, 2011, 08:16:56 PM
"In God we trust, all others must pay cash"
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: ~L on May 11, 2011, 12:04:40 PM
"Do not follow where the path may lead. Go where there is no path...and leave a trail."

Of what???
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: ~L on June 29, 2011, 01:38:10 PM
  :)Society prepares the crime; the criminal commits it.:)
It is bordered by smiley faces.
???
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: dave from knoxville on June 29, 2011, 02:51:32 PM
"Do not follow where the path may lead. Go where there is no path...and leave a trail."

Of what???

Slime
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: buffcoat on June 29, 2011, 07:36:14 PM
"Go Eff Yourself."

Man, I never quite got over that one.
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: zaxxon25 on July 06, 2011, 07:48:23 AM
"He is looking at you fondly"
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: hotmessization on July 06, 2011, 09:58:41 AM
Years back, I was staying with family in San Francisco, in which we went to two Chinese places about a month apart. Both times, my cousin's former husband received the same fortune:

"Lock your doors."
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: Tor_Hershman on July 06, 2011, 10:47:43 AM
Awwww, sheeet!  Moi 'twere a-gonna put me Dr. (Fortune cookie fill) Phil parody here but Am I Right has too many to go through & I forgot just who moi parodied.

Here's a James Brown one.....
http://www.amiright.com/photoshops/j/james-brown-godfather-of-soul-1274898317.shtml (http://www.amiright.com/photoshops/j/james-brown-godfather-of-soul-1274898317.shtml)
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: ~L on November 14, 2011, 09:43:02 PM
"Be on the alert to recognize your prime at whatever time of your life it may occur."

Either someone took too many English classes or this is long hand for "Don't screw up your life."
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: ~L on January 24, 2012, 09:45:22 PM
Cookie was empty. No fortune. 
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: ~L on August 28, 2012, 12:20:49 AM
One cookie:

"Fear is the darkroom where
negatives are developed."

The next cookie:

"Ignore previous cookie."
Title: Re: Disappointing Fortune Cookie fortunes
Post by: ~L on May 15, 2013, 11:59:36 PM
This sheds a little light on the subject.
http://theweek.com/article/index/244173/how-do-fortune-cookie-messages-get-written (http://theweek.com/article/index/244173/how-do-fortune-cookie-messages-get-written)