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The Best Show on WFMU => Show Discussion => Topic started by: Mike Desert on December 11, 2013, 10:13:18 PM

Title: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Mike Desert on December 11, 2013, 10:13:18 PM
I was just relisting to an old bit tonight and re-laughing my ass off.  These are my top 3 favorite things

1. At one point on all three stages, all three bands were doing "Shake Some Action" at the same time
2. His whole life is basically built around going downhill (Another Power Pop reference, but Quad P reminded me of my friend Jim Freek and that Beatle Bob dude so I LOVE those bits!)
3. It's pure Norwegian black metal, you fool! -Zachary Brimstead

This probably belongs in the favorite Wursterisms thread, but I also love the way he says "mozzarella" ...and all references to GG "passing on"  :D
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Mr. Spacely on December 11, 2013, 11:29:46 PM
The "downhill" bit on Quad P1 is amazing.

I've always been partial to Kid eBay's shocked, "how old are you, son?!" when he thinks Tom doesn't know who Rod Carew is.

I also adore Darren's quiet, conflicted "you're judging" when Tom grimaces at the notion of Darren painting the stars of MASH in the nude.

And finally, going all the way back to the beginning, Ronald Thomas Clontle explaining that "some of the opinions I agree with, some of them I disagree with... I am not a critic. I am not a scholar. What I am, is a COMPILER of opinions."


Bonus! The Audio Guru disciple's strange pronunciation of guru. "guh-ROO."




Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Quilombo on December 12, 2013, 12:09:16 PM
1. I'm paraphrasing (or imagining the whole thing) but there was one call where JW is telling Tom about his project for a movie which Tom is going to star in.

'I have to warn you. You have five erotic scenes, and three of them are solo'


2. The zobra expression: 'Get the slice out of your ears!'

3. Kenny Dupree telling Tom that 'You need to take some history classes, young son'
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: pnic101 on December 12, 2013, 12:10:54 PM
More PPPP: I love Tom's giggling after the description of "A Night on Powerpop Mountain" when he KNOWS the bigfoot is gonna like the music.

Just listened to Tornado Todd: The moment after he gets Tom to read his Pimp City script when he reneges on the deal not to publish his Celebrity Smut Patrol tape.  Wurster's laugh and line reading of "sorry" kill me.

Wurster's line reading of "LN5-OG" in Andy from Lake Newbridge.

And so many more
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: siebert on December 12, 2013, 12:38:00 PM
My number 1 Wurster line is from Springsteen author, Steven Jennings, who mentions Metallica bassist, Robert Trujillo, had to bail on the Springsteen Seeger tour because he couldn't find a vintage basketball jersey from the era.


Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: steely damn on December 12, 2013, 02:34:51 PM
I'm going to spend some time thinking this over, but one that jumps out immediately:
Recording Engineer Rick Spangler the whole "- sucks" section is great, but Rick gives the impression that his father has passed on and Tom extends condolences and he replies:
Oh, he didn't die, he just came home one day and told us: "Yeah we're done here".

I don't even remember the exact bit, but Jon was describing a "flagrant night-prowl":
Jon: ..And then I beat up a rock concert.
Tom : You beat somebody up at a rock concert?
Jon: .No, I beat up a rock concert. I just walked in there and started swinging..

Bruce Willis - I'm gonna make you eat a lawnmower/ I'm gonna pick your kids up and throw them at you threats.
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: johnnynovato on December 12, 2013, 02:45:53 PM
Yeah, for me the Bruce Willis threats and the Pat Sajak credo.
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Ribot4President on December 12, 2013, 05:36:46 PM
Kidd Ebay:  "I think the blood has moved to my lungs"
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: nrt4 on December 12, 2013, 09:08:33 PM
"It was like a generation of kids that only never rocked, but had never had sex or had never gone to the bathroom either. I know that last thing I said was very weird but I...I said it." - Best Show 500 call on the state of rock n' roll in 2017.

 
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Bridgey on December 13, 2013, 07:23:24 AM
Andy from Lake Newbridge's threat. At first it was the unfeasibly gruff "DUM DUM. DUM DUM. DUM-DUM-DUM-DUM DUM-DUM-DUM-DUM..." and then Tom snarking about how cliched it was. But I love the whole of it too, and the fact that a fish is having a "bass" about Undertones trivia at the whole start of the call.

PJ from Old Skull talking about "Cucoocoo's coongas and Chilean pipi drums".

Bob Bogle Jr's introduction-cum-insult on his call. 

All those little things.

*cry-sings to that One Direction song*

Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Mike Desert on December 13, 2013, 01:50:32 PM
There was also: "Michael Quercio brought the ultra-violence" that always makes me smile
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: buffcoat on December 13, 2013, 05:29:57 PM
Bob Bogle Jr's introduction-cum-insult on his call. 

Like I said... it's not in your mouth.
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: BleephouseRat on December 15, 2013, 09:36:53 AM
1. My current favorite moment is from the "Ziegler Family Family Wudder Show" call:
Roy: "And Tom... I can't wait for you to eat my lap cakes."
Tom: ................................... What?
I think Tom's reaction here is one of the best reactions I've ever heard.  There's so much anticipation in that long pause, and then his "What" is so perplexed and exhausted; he's clearly unsure how to even begin addressing what Roy just said (even before he continues, "I don't even know what to say to that.") It's perfect.

2. "Thad, those Packers packed us. We got packed, Thad." (Roy again)

3. I can't decide what goes here, so I'll just say, "MickNick PickMickNick," "The Van Morrison Variety Two Hours," "Sergio the Burgerback," or any time JW says "It was sick."
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Bridgey on December 15, 2013, 05:00:25 PM
...and there's more:

Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Denim Gremlin on December 16, 2013, 08:00:58 AM
my favorite exchange ever was when philly boy roy took over the studio and was playing bang on the drum all day

roy "who don't love slap bass"
tom "yeah, who 'dont'?"
roy "nobody don't not love it!"
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: roman on December 16, 2013, 12:04:17 PM
Gene Simmons: Fontasy

Rick DeBetto: Moosarella
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: JesseFromVegas on December 16, 2013, 02:58:38 PM
Three way tie for first:

Philly Boy Roy: "What he did was wrong, and I think he knows it." - referring to Patton Oswalt's brother Lee Harvey Oswalt's assassination of John F. Kennedy.
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: JonFromMaplewood on December 16, 2013, 03:40:39 PM
"You yutzknuckle" has become common parlance in my household.
Second place: "I'm gonna make you eat a lawnmower!"
Third place: "My mom put it on top of the fridge. Where I can't reach it."
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Ribot4President on December 16, 2013, 04:02:56 PM
Three way tie for first:

Philly Boy Roy: "What he did was wrong, and I think he knows it." - referring to Patton Oswalt's brother Lee Harvey Oswalt's assassination of John F. Kennedy.

That one's big in my house as well.
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Mike Desert on December 16, 2013, 11:21:30 PM
I always loved Tom's mocking/laughing at "Husker Dude"

Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: stephen on December 28, 2013, 05:30:54 PM
"Once you've had Fudge Fruit, you'll never go back to Dumb Fruit."
- Zachary Brimstead Esq.
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: buffcoat on December 28, 2013, 06:13:03 PM
"Once you've had Fudge Fruit, you'll never go back to Dumb Fruit."
- Zachary Brimstead Esq.

Definitely.
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Crusherkc on December 29, 2013, 12:42:24 AM
"Come partake of my fruit basket" from Jan 31st 2006, Marky Ramone readin' from his romantic novel Lady Wainsworth's Desires.

I love every part of this call, the droning voice saying lines like "she could not but help noticing the glistening upper muscular torso of stable boy Marcus as he carried an oversize bag of feed to the awaiting horses" to Marky's menacing admonishes "Hey I don' need no comment...lemme finish right?!" of Tom's reactions ("yeech")

Also Tom undercutting Marky's big announcent "A worst case scenario would be if you said something...stupid like...you were going to reform The Ramones"...."yeh. Thanks for ruinin' it, guy."

Then one of my top 3 all-time favorite Wurster lines "That ain't not no funny to no one else neither" drops and Tom spends the next two minutes dissecting it. One of the funniest lines in probably my favorite call.  "It goes for the jugglah"

Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Carver on December 29, 2013, 04:30:20 PM
Love Tom's reaction as he realizes that the stableboy is pretty much Marky Ramone, down to the jeans and canvas sneakers.
"What's his name... Marcus??"
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Epic Soundtracks on December 30, 2013, 04:32:14 PM
The welts left on PBR left by 50 Ovation guitars, etc, that have made him "a shy lover to this day" (final episode) followed by Tom's "ew"s and strange murmurs of assent from Roy.
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: bookgills on December 31, 2013, 01:15:10 AM
HAPPY BELABORED HOAGIE DAYS, TOM
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Crusherkc on January 13, 2014, 04:30:57 PM
"Come partake of my fruit basket" from Jan 31st 2006, Marky Ramone readin' from his romantic novel Lady Wainsworth's Desires.

I love every part of this call, the droning voice saying lines like "she could not but help noticing the glistening upper muscular torso of stable boy Marcus as he carried an oversize bag of feed to the awaiting horses" to Marky's menacing admonishes "Hey I don' need no comment...lemme finish right?!" of Tom's reactions ("yeech")

Also Tom undercutting Marky's big announcent "A worst case scenario would be if you said something...stupid like...you were going to reform The Ramones"...."yeh. Thanks for ruinin' it, guy."

Then one of my top 3 all-time favorite Wurster lines "That ain't not no funny to no one else neither" drops and Tom spends the next two minutes dissecting it. One of the funniest lines in probably my favorite call.  "It goes for the jugglah"

My 2nd favorite line would be from January 27, 2009: A Call From Bernie Taupin That Is Not To Be Missed, The Mike Show, Francesa Takes On Snack Mountain And A Ton More!: "Okay then, why don't you play something from He Who..." (Bernie Taupin's short-hand to his own solo lp "He Who Rides the Tiger": "This is Bernie Taupin...why?")
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Andrew F on January 14, 2014, 01:01:54 AM
1. I've used the phrase "Madder than a rattlesnake at a Thai wedding" more than a few times. At home and at work.

2. The inclusion of the word "flagrant" in describing certain injuries/afflictions.

3. Let's have a device-a-thon, you and me
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: TrapNeuterReturn on January 14, 2014, 10:20:57 PM
Anytime PBR says "nem..."
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: around the bend on January 15, 2014, 05:37:28 PM
There was a new street drug that made the caller want to eat a car, I believe.  Best thing ever.
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: JesseFromVegas on January 16, 2014, 01:10:43 PM
"You didn't never not hear no melodica before nem!" - PBR on nem Hooters contribution to rock history, 5/30/06
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: Crusherkc on January 16, 2014, 08:20:44 PM
"Come partake of my fruit basket" from Jan 31st 2006, Marky Ramone readin' from his romantic novel Lady Wainsworth's Desires.

I love every part of this call, the droning voice saying lines like "she could not but help noticing the glistening upper muscular torso of stable boy Marcus as he carried an oversize bag of feed to the awaiting horses" to Marky's menacing admonishes "Hey I don' need no comment...lemme finish right?!" of Tom's reactions ("yeech")

Also Tom undercutting Marky's big announcent "A worst case scenario would be if you said something...stupid like...you were going to reform The Ramones"...."yeh. Thanks for ruinin' it, guy."

Then one of my top 3 all-time favorite Wurster lines "That ain't not no funny to no one else neither" drops and Tom spends the next two minutes dissecting it. One of the funniest lines in probably my favorite call.  "It goes for the jugglah"
My 2nd favorite line would be from January 27, 2009: A Call From Bernie Taupin That Is Not To Be Missed, The Mike Show, Francesa Takes On Snack Mountain And A Ton More!: "Okay then, why don't you play something from He Who..." (Bernie Taupin's short-hand to his own solo lp "He Who Rides the Tiger": "This is Bernie Taupin...why?")

and my 3rd favorite Jon Wurster character line comes from November 29, 2005: Philly Boy Roy Calls In. Timmy Von Trimble Calls In. Jimmy Crespo From Aerosmith Calls In. Talk About The Unfunniest Funny People, MC Steinberg And Some Other Chit Chat.

Jon as former Aerosmith guitarist Jimmy Crespo to young Metalologist Mac "See, who's laughin' now...schmuck...how many pull ups can you do?"  This character was soooo good it really could've been Jimmy Crespo.  If Jimmy Crespo were into hahd-coah like MDC, Black Flag, Circle Jerks...
Title: Re: Top 3 favorite lines of S&W bits
Post by: buffcoat on January 16, 2014, 10:59:40 PM
"Before I answer any question you got for me, I want you to put on necktie. And a suit jacket."


This may be the single best S&W call ever because it seems to have been mostly improvised. And it fully and seamlessly incorporates a caller. And insults to children are always good for a laugh.