My best friend's Canadian bride

[Andy]

I want to get her some sort of a book about how great America is that is obviously obnoxious without being hateful to immigrants. 

[Josh]

pocket declaration of independence and constitution

[TremblingEagle]

America the Book by the Jon Stewart
or I Am America (And So Can You!) Colbert

I prefer the audio versions

[Andy]

I'm thinking about getting her a biography of Leon Redbone because he's the greatest thing to come out of Toronto.  If ou don't believe me watch this video:
[youtube]http://youtube.com/watch?v=VKZBgahnG_w[/youtube]

[Andy]

I wish I could get this in t-shirt form for her:
[youtube]http://youtube.com/watch?v=kOU9FlMdl8A[/youtube]

[buffcoat]

Excerpted from Philip Roth's latest work:

Streaks on the china?  Never mattered before.  Who cared?  When you drop-kicked your jacket?  When you came through the door?  No one glared.  But sometimes, things get turned around.  And no one's spared.

[Amplituden]

There's a change in the status-quo.
Gonna need all the help that we can get.

According to our new arrival,
Life is more than mere survival.
And we just might live the good life yet.

[buffcoat]

When that show ended, I got ready to move to Pittsburgh.  Then someone told me that dude was an ACTOR and not even a real butler.  And that it wasn't even FILMED in Pittsburgh.

Another dream crushed.

[chrisfoll577]

ah, Brocktoon.

i wish i could think of something literary, but all i gots is this song by Hard 'n Phirm:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dOlGWXqqlHI[/youtube]

[Sarah]

My creaky brain just performed an act of heroism:  I read those lyrics, found them vaguely familiar, slowly began to hear the bullfrog stylings of Leon Redbone, and finally, as though hauling a heavy trap from the depths of the sea, my brain laboriously heaved the name of the show out of the murk of my memory.

I am exhausted.  And for what, I ask you?