The FOT's own Dutch?

[Shaggy 2 Grote]

I have Final Draft (tm) so I could help write the script for the trailer, though god knows I don't have the time.  Dorvid, you wanna help me with it?

There is also a tiny chance that I might be able to get Olympia Dukakis and/or Tim Blake Nelson to say "Plunko" into the camera, though I'm not making any promises.  I'm pretty sure I could get Aasif Mandvi from the Daily Show, though.

[KickTheBobo]

I think that one of the more important parts of doing a shooting script for this would be to really consider scenes that would be easy (budget & timewise) to pull off. like, Plunko pushing a carriage with just 20 boxes of Captain Crunch down a supermarket aisle.

Has it even been established where Plunko lives? I'm assuming suburbia, anytown USA.

[Shaggy 2 Grote]

True dat.  Scripting this would be more like using this thread as a checklist and executing the key points as actual shots and dialogue in as simple a matter as possible.  But yes, suburbia, anytown USA (which seems to be Pennsylvania these days, for some reason).  Should one person shoot it, or could we crowdsource the footage and have a single person splice it together (I can not do this)?

I sent this thread to my friend who has a column at the Boston Globe, and he said he actually wants to see Plunko.  I doubt he'd actually help us perpetrate a hoax (and honestly I wouldn't ask him), but he could certainly get any theoretical trailer out into the ether.

[John Junk]

You guys have hit it out of the park.  I have little to add, except that it needs some sort of faux-highbrow literary reference, like Steve Carell's "Proust scholar" in Little Miss Sunshine (raise your hands if you think that screenwriter knows anything Proust other than that the smell of his cookie made him remember a lot of stuff).  Maybe Quarter the arcade attendant wins Plunko over with a few quotes from, um... Ezra Pound?

Or Sylvia Plath.

How about he tries to win her over with Wallace Stevens, but then that's too opaque, so then he quotes something from "We ARe REal" by the Silver Jews. 

Plunko:
"Who said that"

Quarter:
"David Berman"

Plunko:
"Is that a poet too?  That rhymed.  Poetry doesn't rhyme."

Quarter:
"No, he's a poet!  But, umm, yeah, he's also got a band.  That's a lyric from his band, the Silver Jews..."
(Looks around nervously.)

BEAT.

Plunko:
"My dad is Jewish. That's offensive"

Quarter:
"NO!  David Berman is too!  He's got a rabbi and everything."

Plunko:
"My dad is also Silver".

Quarter:
"What?"

Plunko:
"That's a joke.  You're not too quick are you?  What'd you think my dad was like the silver surfer there for a second?  Or the silver Accounts Manager, to be more accurate?  Are we living in the D.C. Universe all the sudden?"

Quarter:
(Embarrassed) "It's Marvel Universe"

Plunko:
"Touche."

Soundtrack Fade-In: "Baby Britain" as covered by Cansei de Der Sexy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-N3OrZzPud8)
(Montage of Plunko and Quarter buying funnel cakes, making fun of children, buying offensive decals and putting them on cars with right-wing bumperstickers and yellow ribbon magnets)




Also: John Flansberg should play Plunko's dad.

[Shaggy 2 Grote]

Actually, if we're really going right for the quirk-kitsch factor, he should just start out quoting the Silver Jews and act like it's Wallace Stevens.

[John Junk]

How about he's wearing a silver jews shirt, prompting the silver jews/silver surfer discussion, then he says somthing like
"Well, my ski vest has buttons like convenience store mirrors and they help me see that everything in this room right now is a part of me" and she says "What?" and he goes "Wallace Stevens said that."

[John Junk]

Quarter absentmindedly makes this drawing of him and Plunko riding a "dragon".  Plunko sees it one day and Quarter is embarassed.  She teases him a lot about it and also asks why they are riding a dog.  He asserts it's a dragon.  She says it's obviously a dog.  "It's a weiner dog!"   "Well, I don't know how to draw dragons, so I drew a firebreathing dog, that flies."  She makes fun of him but is obviously touched and she demands that he let her keep it.  Later on, when they are going through some troubles, she sees this drawing, and writes "On a stupid weiner dog!" underneath "Saves the World" and then starts to cry.

[Shaggy 2 Grote]

I still think anything beyond a Wallace Stevens book in the background is a little too highbrow, but the drawing (and accompanying story) is pure gold.

[Stupornaut]

Yeah, I think the entire cast of characters needs to be introduced in drawings like those.

[Shaggy 2 Grote]

Sounds like an opening credit sequence to me.

[John Junk]

I'm down. 

[Jason]

I'd say that they should live somewhere in Jersey. Partly so we can infringe on Kevin Smith territory but also so they can take a trip into nyc and we can have a nice crowd scene with hasidic jews, punks, hookers and tall black transexuals.

[Chris L]

Partly so we can infringe on Kevin Smith territory

Maybe someone can sneak a shot of that comic book store of his in there somewhere.

[KickTheBobo]

Quarter absentmindedly makes this drawing of him and Plunko riding a "dragon".  Plunko sees it one day and Quarter is embarassed.  She teases him a lot about it and also asks why they are riding a dog.  He asserts it's a dragon.  She says it's obviously a dog.  "It's a weiner dog!"   "Well, I don't know how to draw dragons, so I drew a firebreathing dog, that flies."  She makes fun of him but is obviously touched and she demands that he let her keep it.  Later on, when they are going through some troubles, she sees this drawing, and writes "On a stupid weiner dog!" underneath "Saves the World" and then starts to cry.

exactly the style of doodles I was thinking about!

i tells ya, this is freakin' thing writes itself.

[John Junk]

I say they live at or near the Jersey shore, so that Quarter can work at a seedy Boardwalk arcade.  I guess Seaside Heights makes the most sense, as Atlantic City is a bit too urban/scary to be a safe haven for quirk.  You can then also have a climactic run-in with a group of "guidos" who shove-match/humiliate Quarter when the robot claw won't drop the Spongebob (or some Spongebob knock-off character) and say offensive things to Plunko about her private parts.  WAIT A SEC>These villains could be more or less displaced Kevin Smith characters, and the fake sponge bob (Sluggy Sam or some such) becomes one of those re-occuring weird items in the movie.  Plunko becomes dismayed/disappointed with Quarter that he's such a wimp and she yells at him.  That night Quarter breaks in to the machine so he can give Plunko the Sluggy Sam and prove his love and that he has a set of berries.  Unfortunately he gets caught and gets fired.  Crisis!