(PS, cat-hater who I won't name: You're allergic! Did you ever think you might like them if you could get near them without having an asthma attack?)
I just wrote a one-act play. check it out!
GUY WHO'S ALLERGIC TO PEANUTS
I hate peanuts. They make me die. Keep me away from peanuts.
PEANUT LOVER
I wanna punch you in the face! Did you ever think you might like peanuts if you could get near them without dying?
GUY WHO'S ALLERGIC TO PEANUTS
I have thought of that, but in any case it's irrelevant. My condition is such that peanuts will kill me and so I hate them. Sorry.
PEANUT LOVER
Fuming! You asked for it!
Punches GWATP in the face.Now, where have my beloved peanuts gotten to?