Author Topic: POST BURNING SITE  (Read 952846 times)

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1485 on: March 15, 2010, 12:31:55 AM »
What does my ex-wife and a Juggalo have in common?  They both wear too much makeup!  And they are probably both tweaking at this very moment!

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1486 on: March 15, 2010, 12:33:09 AM »
What's the difference between a glass of whiskey and my wife?  A glass of whiskey makes me feel better!

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1487 on: March 15, 2010, 12:34:52 AM »
(Oy...I'm getting punchdrunk....almost to 50...)

So folks, what do you think my wife and a lawnmover have in common?  They both have a guy named Jorge Espinoza on mounting them!

Sarah

  • Guest
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1488 on: March 15, 2010, 12:36:24 AM »
You're almost there, benkrok!  (You have brought out the cheerleader manquée in me.)

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1489 on: March 15, 2010, 12:40:10 AM »
What does a window and my ex-wife have in common?  You can see right through them!

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1490 on: March 15, 2010, 12:41:10 AM »
What does Arby's and my ex-wife have in common?  They are both truly awful things that shouldn't exist in any decent version of the Earth but yet, surprisingly, they do.

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1491 on: March 15, 2010, 12:43:34 AM »
What's the difference between my bicycle and my ex-wife.  My bicycle is seriously sweet.  My ex-wife is, most decidedly not sweet.  And my bike will go places with me whereas my wife didn't want to go to very many places.

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1492 on: March 15, 2010, 12:45:25 AM »
What's the difference between my wife and this enormous glass of booze I'm drinking right now?  The enormous glass of booze helps to ease the pain whereas my ex-wife only helps to exacerbate it. 

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1493 on: March 15, 2010, 12:48:44 AM »
I'd like to dedicate this second to last post to Sarah, who kept me going through thick and thin.  There was a point around post 20 where I thought to myself "benkrok, you are a class AAA idiot, making up ex-wife jokes for nobody's enjoyment when you should be donning your jammies and going to bed".  She egged me on, so blame her for the awfulness of posts 20-50.

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1494 on: March 15, 2010, 12:49:54 AM »
Why did my ex-wife cross the road?  To stomp on the remains of my foolish heart!

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1495 on: March 15, 2010, 12:55:01 AM »
I feel so used.  2 hours of non-stop horrible jokes and I don't see any surprises after 50 posts...maybe I'll just start posting ex-wife jokes in random other threads till I get whatever treasure is due to me.

Sarah

  • Guest
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1496 on: March 15, 2010, 12:56:34 AM »
I have rarely been so proud.  Congratulations, benkrok.  Was it worth it?  (Whoops, just saw you already answered that.  Still want to thank me?)

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1497 on: March 15, 2010, 01:02:36 AM »
Sarah, I saw the quality of the downloads section and am re-thinking my dedication to posting to 50.  However!  I am a recent Best Show listener and have been screaming "Heave Ho!" at everyone the last few days.  So I'll probably be around the forums for a while.  Thanks a ton for the cheerleading...

Sarah

  • Guest
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1498 on: March 15, 2010, 01:09:04 AM »
Think of it this way:  you brightened a dark Lubec evening.  Not what you hoped for, but something, anyway.

Rev. Calvin Butts

  • Policemans heel
  • Posts: 77
Re: POST BURNING SITE
« Reply #1499 on: March 15, 2010, 01:20:05 AM »
If you were even slightly entertained, then it's all worth it.  I went to college up in Maine and it's a beautiful place (though Lubec seems awfully remote).