My fave:
I issued an open challenge to Pete Seeger, that I would fight him however he chose to fight, whether it be bare fists or I can be
bare-fisted and he can have his banjo to swing at me - but if he goes into the combat that way,
he has to know that if I get the banjo from him, I'm going to beat him with it.
Also, anytime Tom offers to fight a surly teen and and any five of the teens friends simultaneously.