And, besides that, what's the fucking point of smoking cigarettes anyway?
i didnt start smoking until i was twenty-two. i would say, personally, ive always been an anxious, panic-ridden individual who enjoys being a wallflower; i mean, i truly appreciate the patience of people watching from afar. eventually, as an adult, that doesnt play too well in branching out and discovering new things, mostly because it creates the general opinion that if youre quiet, you must be shy, rather than, "maybe i just dont want to let everything in my head come spilling out of my mouth."
at some point, i needed time to step out and be alone without people thinking "something must be wrong" (a very common reaction when i do this without smoking), but i realized that smoking would give me the cloak i needed...and there it is. this is always why i was (am?) a social smoker; i most definitely do not smoke when i am alone- its boring.
it may sound strange and nonsensical, but it is what it is.
