Top Chef Chicago

[Laurie]

I'm getting sucked into the Elizabeth Berkley dance show. Dancers are so accustomed to taking abuse & choreographers are so used to dishing it out--the stuff that gets said at judging is completely astonishing. Plus Jerry Mitchell doing his best Tim Gunn.

I KNOW. I love it too.

I haven't heard anything horrible from the judging panel, but I did watch that "Make Me a Supermodel" UK marathon wherein a dead-eyed Rachel Hunter, a trollish modeling agency owner, and Zippy the Pinhead heaped abuse on a lady for being too fat (size 12UK/8-10 US). Uh... Why'd you cast her if you didn't want her to win, smart guys? And why did you send them out to pubs and fancy restaurant and supply them with a near limitless supply of alcohol if you didn't want them to put on weight? Assholes. So, as the judging panel calls this poor girl a fat, ugly slob who doesn't deserve to be there (again, you cast her... why?), they praise this clinically underweight teenage girl for having the ideal body.

[iAmBaronVonTito]

I'm getting sucked into the Elizabeth Berkley dance show. Dancers are so accustomed to taking abuse & choreographers are so used to dishing it out--the stuff that gets said at judging is completely astonishing. Plus Jerry Mitchell doing his best Tim Gunn.

I KNOW. I love it too.

I haven't heard anything horrible from the judging panel, but I did watch that "Make Me a Supermodel" UK marathon wherein a dead-eyed Rachel Hunter, a trollish modeling agency owner, and Zippy the Pinhead heaped abuse on a lady for being too fat (size 12UK/8-10 US). Uh... Why'd you cast her if you didn't want her to win, smart guys? And why did you send them out to pubs and fancy restaurant and supply them with a near limitless supply of alcohol if you didn't want them to put on weight? Assholes. So, as the judging panel calls this poor girl a fat, ugly slob who doesn't deserve to be there (again, you cast her... why?), they praise this clinically underweight teenage girl for having the ideal body.

oh, what do you mean...she's not underweight.  she obviously has a weird fin disease.

[Omar]

"The asparagus were supposed to be erect?"

Let's get this thread going again!

Also: next week I will start a new Top Chef drinking game.  Every time Lisa says "f--ked" I will chug a Michelob Ultra Lime, which, sadly, appears to be the brew of choice for the show. 

[Sarah]

1.  Richard may be a decent chef, though a little too self-consciously quirky for my tastes, but I hated that he described himself as very witty.  That's almost as bad a Tracy Ullman calling herself an old soul.

2.  Dale couldn't make his own curry without a machine?  Pathetic.

3.  I wanted Spike and Andrew to win, even though Dale and Richard's dish was more original.  I mean, Colicchio called it the most perfectly seasoned dish that had been prepared thus far--doesn't that merit a top score?

4.  I want a Vita-Prep blender.  Robot Coupes look pretty nifty, too.

5.  I hate all the contestants.

[Omar]

How about the interview clips where Richard's faux-hawk was, for lack of a better term, flaccid.  Yikes. 

[erika]

1.  Richard may be a decent chef, though a little too self-consciously quirky for my tastes, but I hated that he described himself as very witty.  That's almost as bad a Tracy Ullman calling herself an old soul.

I actually almost yelled at my TV when he did that.

It's like someone saying "I've got a great personality, you guys". Ugh.

[Martin]

How about the interview clips where Richard's faux-hawk was, for lack of a better term, flaccid.  Yikes. 

Haha! I loved that! What an idiot!

I like Dale more and more. 

[iAmBaronVonTito]

yikes is an understatement, omar.  and michelob ultra lime...i know, its sad.  but why are you punishing yourself?



p.s. dale, spike, and andrew=new favorites...lisa and jennifer=too bitter and negative, vote 'em off!

[Laurie]

I want to yank out Lisa's stupid eyebrow ring so badly!

[erika]

I'm watching this right now and if I had a shirt that said "Team Stephanie" I would be wearing it. True story.

[Omar]

I'm watching this right now and if I had a shirt that said "Team Stephanie" I would be wearing it. True story.

"Stephanie: Peanut butter, tomato, chicken, and couscous, actually sounds bad but tasted great. She put combinations together like a child would but it had great flavor." -- Art Smith on Stephanie's Elimination Challenge dish. 

Very odd that they did not air any of his positive comments about this dish since Tom and Gail essentially ripped it as being disgusting.  I think the only thing I heard Smith say about it was that the couscous was a "pile of mush." 

In the same interview, Smith says that Mark's curry had "nice flavor."  How did Lisa survive this one? 

[erika]

Eh, I think they just had it in for Mark.

I was worried though. Stephanie totally missed the mark on kid-friendly food.

[senorcorazon]

select one total jerk, one lovable guy, someone who is having a "personal crisis and trying to reconnect with the soul of cooking", a token woman (who is kind of steely and vaguely unlikable), and a technician and you've got your final five. My guess, following this: Andrew, Mark,  maybe Jennifer, Stephanie, and Richard. Prove me wrong, sweet Padma.

Crap - I'm down another!

PS - Why oh why has someone not done a March Madness style bracket for this show?!

[Sarah]

Swap Dale for Mark and Antonia for Jennifer, and you've got it.

I liked Dale again this episode, but I see from the coming attractions that he's due for a tantrum next week.

Nikki makes the cut once more--amazing.  Her meal seemed pleasant enough, but I think it's ridiculous that the story she told about its origins should have counted in its favor.  It also annoyed me that she was also the only one who didn't let her kid talk when Tom asked what was what in the kitchen.

Mark deserved to go: he should have been able to do more for ten dollars, curry was a silly choice for this challenge, neglecting to provide a reasonable amount of protein in the dish was dumb in this context, and at least some of the judges didn't think much of the flavor.

Did everyone love Richard's statement that he wanted to go home and make babies, "little Blaises"? 

Note:  All the cooking shows I've been watching lately inspired me today to make my own panko breadcrumbs (a term that bothers me for the same reasons "shrimp scampi" does).  I'm going to use them to bread some pollack this evening.  I wonder if I'll be a convert to their virtues or decide all the hype about them is, well, hype?

[erika]

Panko's ok. Nothing spectacular. I prefer cornflake crumbs. Salmon, egg, yellow mustard, cornflake crumbs, and some onion make fabulous salmon cakes. Bread them in more crumbs and fry them in a little oil.

Delicious and way cheaper.



Richard is growing on me. Naturally, if he talked less I would like him more.