These are the (awful) people in your neighborhood thread

[emma]

You've got layers, don't you?

Do I ever.

[AllisonLeGnome]

We have a neighbor accused of big-time predatory lending/outright lying (who's also very likely in the Mafia). That's always fun to drive by and wave to his kids.

[Patrick]

a few years ago i lived in a building that had its share of characters.  when i moved in the original second floor tenant had a thing for bikes, i later found out that he had a thing for stealing bikes.  in our back yard there where dozens of bikes in various stages of disrepair.  one winter we had a huge snow bank at the end of the drive way with all kind of bike parts sticking out of it, i guess the landlord just plowed without care.  after he moved out i took it upon myself to go through the pile and "liberate" anything of use.   

while living in this building we had a VW van magical appear one day in the drive way, i guess no one though anything of it until a few months passed and it never moved.  with all four tires flat, one day i deiced to check it out, turns out it was unlocked and full of $1000's construction tools.  I called the land lord and he had it towed....  to later find out it belonged to the boyfriend of one of the tenets. 

after the bike guy moved out 4 frat type dudes moved in, and every nigh was poker night at there place...  they would be up till 3 or 4 screaming and playing poker....

one night i awoke to the smell of smoke.  so i checked it out and it turned out that the hallway was full of smoke, so i called 911 and woke up my two roommates and headed out side...  we tried to get everyone out on the way.  when the fire dept showed up they knocked on the first floor door and it turned out that the guy had set his couch on fire and managed to put it out, and thought nothing of it.  he was shocked to see the fire dept. it also turned out that the smoke alarms in the building did not work.   

a few weeks later the door bell rang and i went down to answer and two really tough looking guys where asking about the guy on the first floor and i asked them who they where.  They took Portland Police badges out and told me they where undercover cops and that i should go back to my apartment and lock the doors...  needless to say i did not stick around the see what the outcome was.

there was also the largest drug and illegal weapon seizure in Maine history in a house on the same block.  the guys tried to set the house on fire to escape but ended up getting caught and had a felony arson charge added. 

hope you enjoyed my recounting of the crazy times at 224 Spring St....

[iAmBaronVonTito]

the last apartment we were in had this guy below us who insisted on playing the same eric clapton and stevie ray vaughn songs whenever he picked up his guitar.  we tried to get a little rythym section going with our feet when we did our music and he came knocking on our door.  i told him, "quite the clapton and we'll talk." 

apparently he had amnesia because he continued to come up and ask us (albeit, politely) frequently to quit the "stomping" and we would apologize, then go back to playing music without any way to keep time than in our heads (its not as fun). 

other than that, ive had decent neighbors.  now roommates...thats another thread.

[erika]

One of my neighbors (the one who's living room butts up against mine) seems to have a very nice surround sound system. He also seems to have a lady friend who he talks to on the phone in a sexy-type way.

What is the connection, you ask?

Well, the phone seems to be hooked up to the very nice surround sound system. I have overheard many giggly conversations, as well as the sound of someone faking orgasms shaking my walls. I know it's over the phone, because I hear it ring a few times and then I hear a woman talking. Then a little later I hear the moaning, etc.

And then another time I definitely heard someone getting fellated over the surround sound. Maybe it was a pron. But seriously, if you live that close to other people, put some headphones on.

[iAmBaronVonTito]

One of my neighbors (the one who's living room butts up against mine) seems to have a very nice surround sound system. He also seems to have a lady friend who he talks to on the phone in a sexy-type way.

What is the connection, you ask?

Well, the phone seems to be hooked up to the very nice surround sound system. I have overheard many giggly conversations, as well as the sound of someone faking orgasms shaking my walls. I know it's over the phone, because I hear it ring a few times and then I hear a woman talking. Then a little later I hear the moaning, etc.

And then another time I definitely heard someone getting fellated over the surround sound. Maybe it was a pron. But seriously, if you live that close to other people, put some headphones on.

im glad (i think) you brought that up, erika.  i completely forgot about the neighbor whos bedroom shared a wall with ours.  you could hear every coital moan from the woman- they sounded very unsatisfying.  best part about it was trying to guess which of the neighbors we would see walking out of the building belonged to the apartment on the other side of the wall.

[John Junk 2.0]

I used to live under some young Brazilian ladies who walked around in high heels all the live long day and who were often on the phone crying/yelling at their boyfriends.  When their boyfriends would actually be around, you'd hear the bed shaking from the rapid-fire F-style they employed.  I always felt a little adjunct hearing them do it upstairs, but that's not really our style anyway.  They seemed coked out and mobbed up but I had no reasonable evidence of this.

[masterofsparks]

the last apartment we were in had this guy below us who insisted on playing the same eric clapton and stevie ray vaughn songs whenever he picked up his guitar.  we tried to get a little rythym section going with our feet when we did our music and he came knocking on our door.  i told him, "quite the clapton and we'll talk." 

A friend of mine had a neighbor who played loud music late into the night. After politely asking the neighbor to turn it down several times and being assured it wouldn't happen again, only to be awoken by loud music a week or so later, my friend decided to take matters into his own hands. Right before leaving for the weekend, he placed his speakers up against the wall he shared with the neighbor, turned the stereo up to full blast, and put Slayer's Reign in Blood on repeat.

When my friend got back home on Sunday night, the neighbor knocked on the door, said "Man, I'm sorry," and they never had another cross word between them.

[iAmBaronVonTito]

brilliant

[buffcoat]

A friend of mine was woken up several days in a row by a guy in a Jeep who drove up to the apartment complex at 6AM with music blaring and left his car, music on, running in the parking lot for 15 minutes while he went inside.

My friend came out one morning, gently turned down the stereo, and kicked a foot-wide dent in the guy's side door.

I know, I know, Internet tough guy violence-to-property stories are done to death, but I like this one, and it's better than that ant-grasshopper story.

[AllisonLeGnome]

My awful neighbor's kids are in my camp this week (I'm a counselor at a children's science museum). When they mentioned their cat that had died (they seemed quite upset), I figured it was best to not tell them how their mom had once said she was waiting for it to get lost or die to get rid of it, after it repeatedly tried to escape to our house. She suggested we carpool in a tone that was only half joking. Yikes.

[yesno]

A friend of mine was woken up several days in a row by a guy in a Jeep who drove up to the apartment complex at 6AM with music blaring and left his car, music on, running in the parking lot for 15 minutes while he went inside.

My friend came out one morning, gently turned down the stereo, and kicked a foot-wide dent in the guy's side door.

I know, I know, Internet tough guy violence-to-property stories are done to death, but I like this one, and it's better than that ant-grasshopper story.

That's great.  I've only a few times in my life actually carried out doing/saying the kinds of things I always wish I could do.

Once, on my last day of delivering subs, I told a lady who always made drivers drive like 5 miles in order to deliver a $4 sub that she paid for with a check-- no tip-- to either start tipping or never order again.

When I worked at a coffee shop I (with the owner's blessing, she hated this too) I told someone she was being rude with her loud cell phone on line behavior.  Not much but both basically took all my strength.  I can't imagine the guts it takes to actually beat up a car.

[Gilly]

What's proper apartment etiquette?

- I have a night job so I stay up until 2-3 am watching TV. Can I have it at a normal volume that I can hear above my AC?

- I have friends over sometime that smoke. We're not loud but we go out on to the porch to smoke. Some neighbors windows are open. Is that bad or should that be expected when you live in an apartment?

I should be able to live normally without being obnoxious without having to worry about if I'm bugging the neighbors right?

[John Junk 2.0]

What's proper apartment etiquette?

- I have a night job so I stay up until 2-3 am watching TV. Can I have it at a normal volume that I can hear above my AC?

- I have friends over sometime that smoke. We're not loud but we go out on to the porch to smoke. Some neighbors windows are open. Is that bad or should that be expected when you live in an apartment?

I should be able to live normally without being obnoxious without having to worry about if I'm bugging the neighbors right?

Do you have a roommate and you're worried about your roommate with the tv, or the neighbors?  I wouldn't worry about the neighbors with the tv thing.  The smoking thing is more touchy.  i don't really mind too much, but that kind of thing drives my g.f. up the wall.  Especially in the summer when a lot of the time you need that window open.  It's no fun to all the sudden have cig smoke wafting in while you're trying to sleep.

[Gilly]

Yeah, I hear that. I usually go outside to the front of the apartment where it won't blow in peoples windows but then I'm opening and shutting doors and walking in hallways quite a bit. I've never had anybody complain about it but I'm a person who is conscious about that sort of thing because I get bugged easily. But, I think in apartments you have to understand that people have different hours and lifestyles as long as they aren't being ridiculous about it.