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Author Topic: Spiderman Bible Stories  (Read 5179 times)

kimota

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Spiderman Bible Stories
« on: March 12, 2008, 09:52:07 AM »
I don't know where to even begin with this...


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Denim Gremlin

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #1 on: March 12, 2008, 01:23:12 PM »
Jesus's crown of thorns looks like a straw hat.
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kimota

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #2 on: March 12, 2008, 01:26:02 PM »
Spidey webbed him up a sombrero, you know, to keep the sun out of his eyes while he slowly died over three days.  And apparently just hung out at he top of the cross to keep him company?  Spidey's a good pal.  Even to offer Jesus eggs and BACON after he woke up from his deathnap.
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Gagneaux

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #3 on: March 12, 2008, 01:49:28 PM »
Now I kinda kinda wish that was the Best Show premium poster
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kimota

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #4 on: March 12, 2008, 01:51:47 PM »
Maybe with Bryce and Horse instead of Spiderman and the Hulk??
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Spoony

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #5 on: March 12, 2008, 01:56:37 PM »
A virgin birth produces cobwebs? Oh, I get it, Humphrey.

Moses looks like a fairy compatent superhero himself. The guy's just leaning back and letting the Hulk tidy up. Lazy Moses.
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TremblingEagle

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #6 on: March 13, 2008, 11:19:05 AM »
did Mary stay a virgin her whole life?

had to be rough for Joseph.
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Spoony

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #7 on: March 13, 2008, 01:35:17 PM »
Actually Mary was supposed to have had a whole squadron of kids later on in life. Joseph was a BULL, I tell you. A BULL!

C
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kimota

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #8 on: March 13, 2008, 01:37:11 PM »
I think Mary stayed away from the cock.  Wasn't she taken to heaven whole b/c she was still a virgin?
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Spoony

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #9 on: March 13, 2008, 02:03:37 PM »
I don't know. I wasn't there.
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Gilly

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #10 on: March 13, 2008, 04:03:48 PM »
They've done this kind of thing with other comics as well. There are a bunch of Christian Archie comics. That's not as weird I suppose.
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Spoony

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #11 on: March 14, 2008, 11:20:13 AM »
I've seen those, but this comic has to be a joke. The cowboy hat? "Saving" Eve? The bacon thing... that's not an easy mistake.

Ugh, what battle am I setting my self up for? I don't even know what I'm defending. Damn you, Bible Spidey.
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Wes

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #12 on: March 14, 2008, 11:25:26 AM »
Also, Cain wasn't from Atlantis in the original, sans Spider-man Bible. He may be Atlantean in the Ultimate Bible, but I haven't been following that.
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Shaggy 2 Grote

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #13 on: March 14, 2008, 11:27:50 AM »
Yeah, I think the Archie comics really meant it.  I don't think anyone is proselytizing for Spidey, though I might start.

Any Jack Chick fans out there?  Eugh.  That stuff's like Werner Herzog for kids.  FUNdamentalism!
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kimota

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Re: Spiderman Bible Stories
« Reply #14 on: March 14, 2008, 11:35:44 AM »
I think the Spiderman strip came from a magazine called The Wittenburg Door, which looks like a fundamentalist publication.  I couldn't find it archived on the site but it fits right in what what they are doing.
http://www.wittenburgdoor.com/
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