I think old obituaries have a lot more style than obituaries have nowadays. Don't you think "turned her face to the wall" is much more personable than "passed away?" You should all start working on your obituaries now because you don't want to end up letting some funeral director write it and you never know when the bus will hit you.
That's true. The celebs already have their obits written for them, why shouldn't I have mine written too.
I sprinkled lots of quotes from Janet Maslin and Larry David in there, you know, to get some primary sources in there.
Basically, the premise was that I died because I couldn't handle the fact that Dane Cook is such a successful comedian. My entire ethos hinged on the belief that you can't be both funny
and good looking--it's just not possible. When Dane Cook came on the scene it was just too much for me to handle and my immune system faltered. Oh and the syphilis, that didn't help either.
