#11 - Music from "The Elder"One year before releasing their hardest rocking studio album (Creatures of the Night - you need to read {or reread} these reviews in order, son!), and two years after Gene Simmons sniffed and pouted about releasing a disco album, KISS released, um, The Elder.
The Elder is a concept album for (maybe) a movie that was never written (maybe) and never filmed or released (definitely). It's what Gene Simmons came up with to end the commercial (starting with Unmasked) and (ha!) critical drought (starting with Dynasty) that the band faced.
Keep in mind that this was the thinking MORE THAN 25 YEARS AGO:
"From a marketing standpoint, the glut of Kiss merchandising that had cropped up in the late 1970s had led to a backlash from fans, who felt that Kiss was now more concerned with making money than with making music."
Oddly enough, the secret of the band's eventual return to some prominence was Paul's ability to write cheesy, MTV-friendly ballads. But we're never going to get there.
An aside about my own KISS fandom, such as it was. My neighbor dressed up as Peter Criss for Halloween in (I think) 1978, but I was short of record-buying age at that point. I only became a fan, though, retrospectively (as I later did with REM during the Green {or G4een} period). In both cases, I liked the older stuff better than the new, but I officially joined the KISS bandwagon, fresh off the Duran Duran bandwagon, with 1984's Animalize.
My favorite album then was Alive II (sides one to three), followed by Rock and Roll Over. I completely lost touch with KISS right after Crazy Nights in 1987, surfacing only to take notice of the MTV Unplugged Show. Some of the stuff I've listened to for these reviews was the first time I'd heard it since then - and in the case of Unmasked, the second time I'd ever heard it.
Anyway, before "Heaven's on Fire" and "Crazy Nights" and "Forever," Gene had to take his shot first, and this was it. The result was that Ace couldn't take it anymore. He'd be around for another cover, though not another album, and not most of this one.
As befits the #11 of 13 albums in a critical reevaluation, The Elder is mostly a miss. It has two really good songs, and two more pretty good numbers and a bunch of awful junk.
Bob Ezrin blames it on his cocaine addiction.
The cover is the first to not feature any members of KISS. Which is a shame, because if you want a good laugh, you should check out the band's hairstyles around this time. Gene's knotted ponytail could possibly be considered "tough," but Paul Stanley's hair screams one thing to people who lived through that time "aerobics."
There's not much to be said here about the muddled Andrew-Lloyd-Webber style story that the soundtrack hints at. Several of the songs are made worse by the fact that they shoehorn in the dumb-ass concept. It's something like this (using all the song titles!):
There's "Fanfare," as this kid, who's "Just a Boy," is led in to determine whether he should undertake an "Odyssey." "Only You" can do this, they tell him. He must decide whether to take "The Oath" to live "Under the Rose" (whatever that means). A "Dark Light" opposes him on this journey, where he will face "Mr. Blackwell," and eventually must "Escape from the Island." Doing this will prevent there being "A World Without Heroes" (not the sandwiches, presumably). Finally he sings a song of victory for him - or for "I."
That's how Simmons must have pitched it. It's not as good a tale as the backstory to "Pinball Wizard."
Wikipedia sums it up this way:
"The basic plot of Music from "The Elder" involves the recruitment and training of a young hero (The Boy) by the Council of Elders who belong to the Order of the Rose, a mysterious group dedicated to combating evil. The Boy is guided by an elderly caretaker named Morpheus. The album's lyrics describe the boy's feelings during his journey and training, as he overcomes his early doubts to become confident and self-assured. The only spoken dialogue is at the end of the last track, "I." During the passage, Morpheus proclaims to the Elders that The Boy is ready to undertake his odyssey."
Close enough.
Also, regarding that precious storyline:
"The version of Music from "The Elder" released in the United States and Europe contained a different song order than the one originally intended. This order was chosen in order to emphasize "The Oath" and "A World Without Heroes" as potential singles (the two songs started each side of the record). One effect this alteration in song order had was to disrupt the narrative flow of the album's story."
Ha ha ha! Good job, Gene!
The songs:
"The Oath" is the first song (before "Fanfare" - good job again). It's heavy falsetto from Mr. Eisen. It's bad but not awful. Grinding guitar, though again, probably not from Ace Frehley.
"Fanfare" is a minute of horns. A bit out of place on a KISS record. It establishes one of the musical themes of the album (musical themes - also out of place on a KISS record), the main riff from "Just a Boy."
Speak of the devil, "Just a Boy" is OK. More falsetto. Stupid lyrics.
"Dark Light," played on the Best Show, is one of the better second level songs. The guitar work is better than anything Ace did on Unmasked. More stupid lyrics, but, hey, it's Ace, and they made him rewrite the lyrics to match the theme, which he surely did not understand or care about.
"Only You" is more Simmonsian nonsense, with a guest vocal from Paul. I imagine that for most of these songs (as on Pink Floyd's Animals, they just took old riffs and forced them into shape with the story. Suffice it to say that Gene Simmons is no Roger Waters). More "Just a Boy" echoes. Dumbass - and I do mean dumbass - vocal effects. "Tell me the secrets..." Tra la la.
"Under the Rose" is also not very good. Pretentious - the choiry voices would not be out of place on "Phantom of the Opera," nor would the lyrics and the dumb guitar.
"Mr. Blackwell" is just goofy Gene trying to sound tough. His voice is distorted.
"Escape from the Island" is another rocker. Its presence is notable because it marks the point in the song-by-song comparison that makes The Elder slightly better musically than Dynasty. Kind of rocking.
"Odyssey" is the most embarrassing song on the album. I swear that Andrew Lloyd Webber DID write this one. So long, so pointless, so awful. Worth a listen just to know what it's like. Hey, it's only a dollar.
"Finale" is more horns, more babbling lines from a movie never made. "He's got light in his eyes, and the look of a champion. A real champion." - I swear this line is said by the guy who made the Smucker's/Cadbury Eggs commercials. Mason Adams. Somebody look that up.
There are two good songs on The Elder.
"A World Without Heroes" is good. I think Gene cries a single tear in the video. Lou Reed wrote the line, "A world without heroes is like a world without sun." Why not?
"I," which shares the distinction with "X" from the Peter Criss solo album of being the shortest KISS song title (though the latter may in fact have been a tribute to Criss' illiteracy). It's a good song, and a fairly honest attempt to write another positive ballad. Definitely better musically and lyrically than several other attempts.
A final note:
"Q Magazine ranked Music From "The Elder" 44th in their list of The 50 Worst Albums Ever."
This is the general thinking on The Elder, but it's only terrible. It doesn't rise to the level of titanically awful.
The last album in the rotation has that honor.