Things that never happened

[kenkwan]

2 freshman in high school things that never happened. Going to see Kansas, for free, and leaving before Ray Charles played. Also, seeing Hootie and the Blowfish.

[Richard_From_CHI]

I saw Christian Death in like 1988. Wow were they horrible.

[Dorvid Barnas]

More Phish shows than the number of years I've been alive.
Cold turkey since '97, but still - no WAY that ever happened.

[bruce]

More Phish shows than the number of years I've been alive.
Cold turkey since '97, but still - no WAY that ever happened.

Dont fell bad David I know someone else whose been to plenty of Phish shows and I love to tease her about it.

[Tim K in DC]

Having to listen to my roommate have what sounds like sad, painful sex with her boyfriend (who is not on the lease but has basically been living here for the last month and a half) is disturbing and obnoxious and gross, and I wish I could believe it never happened or was not happening right now. They also wake me up every morning in the kitchen talking in this weird, disgusting cat-speak (i.e. she: "Mrow?" he: "Meow. The eggs are ready." She: "Wheee!" Me: (muffled) "SHUT THE FUCK UP."). It is worse than living next to a horrible band, Laurie, believe you me. Roommates in general are something I wish never happened.

[TL]

Wow - that's rough.  I think you need to slip that guy some pornography, too.  Hide it somewhere in his own apartment so he stays there more often.  She: "Mrow?"  He: "Whatever.  Can't come over for eggs this morning...  Uh...  I'm busy."  You: "Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz."

[John Junk]

Those last two posts were hilarious and amazing.

Here's one more: Watching Legend of the Overfiend with my best friend in high school.

[Richard_From_CHI]

Seeing Pink Floyds The Wall, more than once.

[Tim K in DC]

Wow - that's rough.  I think you need to slip that guy some pornography, too.  Hide it somewhere in his own apartment so he stays there more often.  She: "Mrow?"  He: "Whatever.  Can't come over for eggs this morning...  Uh...  I'm busy."  You: "Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz."

Awesome.

Problem is, she likes pornography. And the jury is still out on whether the mofo even has his own apartment.

[Sarah]

Interesting that pornography has become the FOT's weapon of choice.  Maybe I should slip some to my real estate developer.

[Tim K in DC]

Re. porn as an untapped weapon of the FOT: You clearly haven't read enough of Laurie's (or my) posts.

[Sarah]

Ah, but, you see, I never read those as attacks against the FOT. 

[TL]

Maybe the next time there's a troll in the chat, we could just throw up a porn link and encourage him (I don't think I'm going out on a limb sugesting that it's a "him," right?) to check it out - it might actually work - FOREVER!

[Laurie]

Maybe the next time there's a troll in the chat, we could just throw up a porn link and encourage him (I don't think I'm going out on a limb sugesting that it's a "him," right?) to check it out - it might actually work - FOREVER!

There's a flaw in that plan. His name starts with an A and ends in an ugust.

I'm not even positing a harmless picture of Violet Blue posing with an Extra Action baritone horn, and I'm certainly not posting clips of the Extra Action flag team bumping and grinding suggestively and/or simulating sex acts and/or actually performing sex acts. Marching bands are filled with filthy dirty pervos.

[TL]

Maybe the next time there's a troll in the chat, we could just throw up a porn link and encourage him (I don't think I'm going out on a limb sugesting that it's a "him," right?) to check it out - it might actually work - FOREVER!

There's a flaw in that plan. His name starts with an A and ends in an ugust.

I'm not even positing a harmless picture of Violet Blue posing with an Extra Action baritone horn, and I'm certainly not posting clips of the Extra Action flag team bumping and grinding suggestively and/or simulating sex acts and/or actually performing sex acts. Marching bands are filled with filthy dirty pervos.

Well, it was kind of just a joke, but your point is well taken!