Best Show jokes you have used in real life.

[Jason from Huntsville, AL]

During a discussion of "Inglorious Basterds" I busted out Karl the Repairman's question: "Did seeing that movie maybe make you think a little less of Hitler?"

I gave proper credit once the laughter died down.

[Paul DeLouisiana]

Once Tom talked about honking and waving at men that you see walking into adult shops. I made a similar comment when a friend and I were driving past and XXX theater and he got a kick out of it.

[cavorting with nudists]

I just received a custom worktable I'd commissioned from a woodworker I know.  Tried "I don't like it...... I LOVE IT" but my delivery must have been a little off.  He just stared at me blankly.

[wood and iron]

This guy who went to my high school posted the above status message. I'm the last comment. Either he's a fan or the joke is working its way into the world.

[Kormod]

This guy who went to my high school posted the above status message. I'm the last comment. Either he's a fan or the joke is working its way into the world.

I hate to be a spoilsport, but the French toast joke has been around for a while.

This is from 2002: http://www.vikarsrant.net/FrenchToastEmergencies.htm

Has anyone other than myself noticed that the moment a snowflake hits the ground people lose their freaking minds?

The same phenomenon happens when any kind of rain hits the road. People forget how to drive. I don't know why this happens, it just does.

For anyone that lives outside of the Tri-state area, let me tell you what happens the moment snow is forecast on television. Everyone anticipates a craving for French Toast. And they have to have it no matter what. Why do I say this? Easy. It's due to the inexplicable run on milk, eggs, and bread that happen the night before a storm (even if the storm doesn't happen, it's the same thing). Hey, quick culinary question: What are the ingredients for French Toast? (Milk, eggs, and Bread - and cinnamon if you want to get fancy)

[wood and iron]

Ah. I can see that being a joke that's been around. It never occurred to me until Tom said it.

I do, however, doubt that this guy has read "Vikar's rant" page, however.

[Tyrannosaurus Rocks]

I refuse to believe Tom would use someone else's material, and the fact that you would suggest he told a joke that wasn't his own creation makes me sick to my stomach.

[wood and iron]

I refuse to believe Tom would use someone else's material, and the fact that you would suggest he told a joke that wasn't his own creation makes me sick to my stomach.

Chill out. Kormod was merely suggesting that some parallel thinking was going on which happens a lot.

[Steve of Bloomington]

I like the guy who goes into the whole theory of why French Toast might be useful in disaster situations. 'Stop complaining, kids! French Toast kept your grandparents alive during the war!'.

[bigoteetoe]

the greatest trick French Toast ever played was getting the devil to cause war and natural disasters.

[bonnaventure]

I bought a car last year, and the sales guy called me to follow up, asking me how I liked my new car... he thought it was pretty funny when I pulled the "...I loved it" on him, but I could tell it threw him for a loop.

I try not to quote Best Show too directly, but a recent intoxicated conversation I had with someone I was channelling JW and started talking about how "The Fresh Prince" was a reality show along the lines of "Big and Rob".

[placeholder]

Not jokes per se, but:

I've gotten in the habit of saying "handburger."  Trying to break myself of it now.

I also sometimes say "You got it" in place of "No problem" or "You're welcome."  Not trying to break myself of that.

I sometimes say "s hit" instead of the toilet word, but it drives my girlfriend up the wall.

I say "toilet language" and "mutant" every so often.

I shave with a chain.

[namethebats]

"Mutant" has slipped into my vocabulary, definitely. And my Garrison Keillor is sounding a lot more like Tom's these days (being in the northern Midwest, it comes up more often than you'd think).

[cavorting with nudists]

"Mutant"
"Blob"
"Pure Filth"
"Munch"
"Buffet Wrecker"
"Massa's Tavern Regular"

My vocabulary of contumely has really spruced up thanks to The Best Show!

[Shaggy 2 Grote]

Too many to remember, but i called a couple of Facebook friends apes last week.