You know, I actually checked out airfares. The cheapest that turned up last night was almost $500, with the trip lasting six hours. And that doesn't include the two hours to Bangor. By bus, it would cost only $85, but the trip each way would take thirteen hours (again, not including the trip to Bangor).
If that weren't enough to discourage me, there's the fact that I'd probably seize up with shock the instant I stepped off the plane/bus, since the largest town I've been to since 1997 (not 1999, as I misremembered last night) has a population of less than 6,000. Some friendly FOT would thus have to have to act as my Virgil from start to finish for me to function at all.
So, all in all, not too practicable. Guess I'll just slum it in the chat with all the other deprived souls.