Stuff you hate (aka: the new f. you thread)

[Christina]

Lake Braddock, proud home of Mia Hamm and half of The Dismemberment Plan.  
Are you from the area, AC?

Oh, yes ... went to Langley.

[Andy]

Every year the company I work for picks a project of the year based on (they claim) a matrix of client satisfaction, profitability, etc... It always jusT seems like the pick the highest profile job. The top 2 jobs present at our managers meeting and a winner is anounced. 

This year I had a job that was a finalist and should have been a slam dunk winner, but it's a smaller job so I was worried we'd ge trumped on job size. When the came back after presentations, they said that it was a tie (for the first time ever)

to me this means that they had one they wanted to win, but the other made such a convincing case that they couldn't not have them win. I just don't know which one my job was (I know which one I think it was, but I can't be sure)

anyway, a tie means neither one of us wins. My gut tells me that they were set up to give it to the other job and we did such a convincing presentation that they couldn't let us lose, but that may be wishful thinking on my part.

Fuck.

[Bryan]

Congratulations?

[iAmBaronVonTito]

Congratulations?

[Steve of Bloomington]

[cutout]

I bought a Rolling Stone today (not proud) because I was traveling on a train. There was an article championing Jonah Hill whose every other word was dick or fuck. Most of the article was him sticking it to anyone who ever doubted he'd be "such a big star" - popular girls in high school, teachers, guidance counselors. There's also an in-depth look at his ability to riff. Example: Conan O'Brien compliments his overcoat. Jonah Hill (improvising): "Yeah, I raped and murdered Inspector Gadget for it". Following are quotes by other comedians testifying to his ability to come up with similarly great jokes, just on the fly like that!

[iAmBaronVonTito]

i don't mind loaning you money, dear sister-in-law, but don't ask for money and then throw out, "...because i lent you $20 bucks that one time, remember?"

i'm still fuming about this.  who would throw the $20 i paid back in my face in order to justify why YOU need $20?  it's my money and i get to choose who i want to loan it to, regardless of the ONE time you loaned me $20 six fucking months ago.

oh, Rage Cage, why aren't you real?!

[Paul DePhiladelphia]

I bought a Rolling Stone today (not proud) because I was traveling on a train. There was an article championing Jonah Hill whose every other word was dick or fuck. Most of the article was him sticking it to anyone who ever doubted he'd be "such a big star" - popular girls in high school, teachers, guidance counselors. There's also an in-depth look at his ability to riff. Example: Conan O'Brien compliments his overcoat. Jonah Hill (improvising): "Yeah, I raped and murdered Inspector Gadget for it". Following are quotes by other comedians testifying to his ability to come up with similarly great jokes, just on the fly like that!

Yeah I really hate Jonah Hill. He reminds me of the jerk in highschool who is fat and ugly and no one likes him but no one can insult him because he has a notebook full of toilet-mouth 'just being honest' insults that he can say really fast.

[erika]

Nothing makes you hate humans more than hearing the thud of a mother's hand/fist hitting their young child in a department store, followed by "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR" and a lot of crying, and then a promise that she will "Fuck you up in public if you don't shut up"

I didn't see this. I heard it from at least 4 aisles away. It almost made me physically sick.

[Sarah]

Kid probably pulled a knife on her.

[erika]

It's all in the game, Sarah. All in the game.

[dave from knoxville]

Nothing makes you hate humans more than hearing the thud of a mother's hand/fist hitting their young child in a department store, followed by "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR" and a lot of crying, and then a promise that she will "Fuck you up in public if you don't shut up"

I didn't see this. I heard it from at least 4 aisles away. It almost made me physically sick.

Erika, swear to God, you go straight to the manager and demand they call the police. For future reference.

[iAmBaronVonTito]

erika, just reading that and knowing exactly what you were talking shot my heart rate up.  oh boy, that's rough.

[erika]

Nothing makes you hate humans more than hearing the thud of a mother's hand/fist hitting their young child in a department store, followed by "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR" and a lot of crying, and then a promise that she will "Fuck you up in public if you don't shut up"

I didn't see this. I heard it from at least 4 aisles away. It almost made me physically sick.

Erika, swear to God, you go straight to the manager and demand they call the police. For future reference.

Mmmm in Baltimore City people don't call the police for stuff like that. I'll try it next time but I bet I'll get jacked in the parking lot or, at best, get laughed at by a city police officer.

[mahgeetah]

I bought a Rolling Stone today (not proud) because I was traveling on a train. There was an article championing Jonah Hill whose every other word was dick or fuck. Most of the article was him sticking it to anyone who ever doubted he'd be "such a big star" - popular girls in high school, teachers, guidance counselors. There's also an in-depth look at his ability to riff. Example: Conan O'Brien compliments his overcoat. Jonah Hill (improvising): "Yeah, I raped and murdered Inspector Gadget for it". Following are quotes by other comedians testifying to his ability to come up with similarly great jokes, just on the fly like that!

Yeah I really hate Jonah Hill. He reminds me of the jerk in highschool who is fat and ugly and no one likes him but no one can insult him because he has a notebook full of toilet-mouth 'just being honest' insults that he can say really fast.

This reminds me of somebody else who I can't stand, and that is Seth Rogen. I still crack up about Tom's imitation of Seth Rogen playing Bernie Madoff 20 years from now the inevitable biopic.